Chapter 652
There were times in life when one's heart seemed to pound so fiercely that it might burst.
It could be due to extreme shock, fear, excitement, or overwhelming emotion.
At that moment, Liana was experiencing such a heart-pounding sensation.
It was because of fear.
But it wasn't just fear.
These heart-pounding moments could be caused by a mixture of emotions.
As overwhelming as the fear was, Liana's heart felt like it would burst.
There were moments when the sound of one's own heartbeat seemed audible not just within the chest, but also to one's own ears.
It was that overwhelming.
But, unable to guess what words would come from those lips, Liana could not look him in the eye, her gaze lowered in front of her friend whom she had not seen in so long.
There had been a moment when they had vowed to kill the Demon King together.
That thought had been deeply appreciated.
But the two who made that resolution were too young back then.
They were too small to consider the great name of the Demon King as their enemy.
There had been a time when it seemed laughable that they, as well as their friend, could even consider seeking revenge.
But at some point, the days when that name weighed heavily had passed.
The determination for revenge lost its direction, and Liana, who had intended to kill the Demon King, had become his most loyal servant.
One of the Demon King's most important minions.
To be precise.
She had become one of those who should only be called the Four Heavenly Kings.
It would take days and nights to explain all that had happened in the meantime.
But in the end, conversation could only begin if they wanted to exchange words.
Despite Liana's hesitant and strained greeting, Clifman only stared at her silently, saying nothing.
Even in the past, Clifman had not been particularly talkative.
Whether or not he was dealing with Liana, Clifman was always a listener, giving short answers when prompted to speak, or rambling when he had more to say.
He had been terribly inarticulate.
Just like then, he was silent now, but Liana couldn't help but notice that it was different from the past.
The Clifman of the past had been short on words because he couldn't find anything to say.
But now, he wasn't unable to find something to say, he was simply choosing his words.
It wasn't that he didn't know what to say.
He was just considering where to begin.
Time had passed.
People change.
Just as Liana had changed, Clifman had naturally changed as well.
"You really came to see someone like me."
The boy who had once been timid had become a cynical man.
You really came to see someone like me.
There was so much meaning in that single sentence that Liana felt dizzy.
In those few words, all of Clifman's thoughts, self-loathing, and disillusionment up until now were contained.
"What… are you saying…? Someone like you…?"
Liana looked at Clifman with trembling eyes.
"I'm weak, aren't I?"
"…"
"That's why you left me behind, right?"
"!"
That was a harsh statement.
It wasn't an insult to Liana, but a self-deprecating remark.
"I was only able to activate Magic Body Strengthening back then. Someone like me would have been useless if you had taken me with you. It was only natural for you to leave me behind."
Unable to bear Clifman's self-deprecating words, Liana had no choice but to interrupt him.
"No, that's not it..."
"Then what?"
"...Huh?"
"Was there another reason?"
Cliffman inquired.
Liana could only bite her lip with a sorrowful expression.
"...If you had come with me, you would have gotten hurt. No, you would have died. I didn't want you to get hurt because of me."
"So you're saying, even if I had gone with you, I would only have been hurt or killed, and my presence would have been of no help to you."
"..."
Essentially, he was saying that she knew that he would be useless and meaningless by her side.
Would the situation have been any different if Cliffman had been there?
Probably not.
He would have only been a burden.
She didn't want him to get hurt, so she didn't take him with her.
She didn't take him with her because the chances of him being a negative factor were high.
In truth, both statements were the same.
Only the way they were expressed was different.
Liana had spoken in the former way, and Cliffman had understood it in the latter way.
And the truth remained that the latter interpretation was true.
But wasn't that too harsh a way to put it?
Wasn't the sentiment more important?
It hurt that her actions, born out of concern for him, were interpreted as being dismissive.
Liana's intentions didn't matter.
He was discarded because he was useless.
He was too weak to go with her.
Follow on NovᴇlEnglish.nᴇtThat was how Cliffman took it.
And ever since the Gate incident, Cliffman had continued to think that way.
"Liana, I'm not saying that I'm bitter or that you shouldn't have done it. You had to do it. And it was the right thing to do. I wouldn't have been any help. I'm sure of it."
"..."
"I don't think much has changed even now."
Cliffman, who once couldn't even choose his words properly, was now able to coldly organize and express his thoughts.
But the direction of all his words was still sad.
It wasn't resentment towards Liana.
It was disillusionment with his weak past self.
A self-assessment bordering on self-hatred.
Cliffman was just stating facts.
He listed the facts without any sign of resentment towards Liana.
All the resentment and disillusionment were directed towards himself.
If he had been strong enough to be of help, Liana would have sought his assistance.
Resentment for his weak past self.
Disillusionment with his weak past self.
Cliffman had continued to feel what the armless Ludwig had felt.
And that was why Cliffman couldn't leave Ludwig alone.
Liana was definitely afraid.
Afraid that Cliffman would pour curses on her, resent her, or blame her in his feelings of betrayal.
She was afraid, thinking that way.
But now, Liana faced an unexpected scene.
Cliffman didn't blame anyone.
Not Liana.
Not the Demon King.
No one.
"Thank you, once again."
"..."
"For coming to see someone like me."
He just resented himself.
Liana was more afraid of this side of Cliffman.
Seeing the broken Cliffman, Liana gritted her teeth and trembled.
"It's my fault. I... I'm sorry..."
As Liana finally burst into tears, Cliffman still gazed at her with a hardened expression.
"It's not your fault, Liana."
"It is. It's all my fault. I..."
"You didn't do anything wrong."
He didn't blame the person who should have been blamed.
Liana couldn't help but know that it was the hardest thing to bear.
Cliffman was not angry, nor did he feel betrayed.
He seemed to accept it as a matter of course.
He hadn't been taken along because he wouldn't have been of any help.
In that case, it was his fault for not being helpful.
It was simply because he was weak.
And even now, he still thought he was weak.
That was all he thought.
Cliffman waited quietly in front of Liana until her tears stopped.
With the same expression as before, Cliffman just stared at Liana.
"Are you calmed down now? Shall we talk?"
"..."
He didn't blame her, but he wasn't affectionate either.
He didn't hug the crying person or pat her back.
He wasn't that kind of person to begin with, but now it seemed he didn't even want to try.
Hearing him say that she wasn't at fault only intensified her guilt.
Liana found Cliffman unfamiliar.
He had become a completely different person, in a different way than she had imagined.
After Liana stopped crying, Cliffman asked her various questions.
Since he genuinely didn't blame her, Cliffman conversed with Liana rather calmly.
In the end, the one who had done wrong was the only one who was restless.
Liana had no choice but to watch Cliffman's reactions throughout, and Cliffman asked what he wanted to ask.
"Your father's death... It wasn't because of the Demon King, right?"
"...Yes."
"So, it was the Empire after all?"
"..."
"I see."
When Liana vanished without a word with the Demon King, Cliffman had no choice but to grasp what had happened to some extent.
If Liana, who had known the Demon King as her enemy, suddenly saved him and disappeared, there would be no other reason.
"Actually, I thought I was going to die that day. It was reckless. I moved with Harriet, but even she was prepared for that. But I didn't want to involve you."
The overlapping situations allowed Reinhardt to escape the temple, and Liana had intended to fight a losing battle.
It was a place where death was certain.
That's why she couldn't take Cliffman with her.
But in the end, it was true that she had conspired with Harriet but hadn't taken Cliffman.
Harriet could be helpful.
Cliffman couldn't.
Wasn't that the truth?
"I understand."
Liana clenched her teeth at the resignation in his tone.
"No... you don't understand at all..."
"I understand well enough that I was useless..."
"I hated the idea of you dying because of me more than I hated the idea of me dying!"
"..."
In the end.
Liana's expression twisted miserably.
Cliffman stared at Liana in silence as she raised her voice.
"It wasn't because you were useless, or because you were weak..."
Tears welled up in Liana's eyes again.
"It was because you were precious to me..."
At Liana's miserable confession, Cliffman's eyes widened.
"You were important to me. I wanted you, at least, not to die... That's why I did it... It wasn't like that. It wasn't that kind of meaning. I'm sorry. I'm sorry for doing that. I was wrong. I know I was wrong. It's just... I was wrong, and it's true that I left you behind. It's true, but..."
"..."
"Please, it wasn't because you were meaningless, or useless, or unhelpful, or weak... It wasn't like that... Please believe me. I'm telling the truth."
She had left him behind.
But the reason she had left...
In the end, it was a story about him.
Liana's words, as she tearfully spoke of her emotions to a Cliffman who was now accepting her feelings differently, were closer to a plea than a confession.
"Just... just hit my cheek. Curse at me. Ask why I left you behind. Call me a traitor... That would be better..."
She was terrified of being scolded, her breath caught in her throat as if she were about to die.
However, seeing Cliffman's state, Liana thought it would be better if he hated her instead.
It was better for someone to find the cause of their problems in others.
If one only sought the cause of their problems within themselves, they would become ill.
Those who lived believing that everything was someone else's fault could at least continue to live.
Those who lived believing that everything was their fault would rot from the inside out.
Liana found it more painful to see Cliffman wallowing in self-pity than to bear his anger.
It wouldn't matter if it were anyone else living that way.
But Cliffman wasn't just anyone to Liana.
Seeing Liana crying, Cliffman stared blankly at the sky.
In the forest.
Sunlight streamed through the leaves.
"I cherished you too."
"..."
"But I couldn't be of any help to someone precious."
"..."
"I didn't want to think you were bad. There must have been a reason for everything, a reason for not speaking, a reason for not taking me with you, a reason for the gate incident. I thought there must be a reason for it all."
Cliffman spoke of thoughts he'd had for a long time.
"I didn't want to resent you."
Out of countless choices, there was just one.
Cliffman did not want to choose resentment towards Liana.
"To not resent you, there was no other way."
Because Liana was precious, he tried to think that all her actions were justified.
Why she didn't take him with her, why she didn't say anything.
To do so, he had to find the cause within himself.
If only he had been stronger.
If only he had been more useful.
If he had been reliable enough for Liana to seek help and tell him everything.
That would have been enough.
To believe that Liana had done nothing wrong.
To not resent Liana, he had no other path but self-hatred.
Watching Cliffman make such a wretched confession, Liana tried to hold back her tears.
"Really..."
With red-rimmed eyes, Liana looked up at Cliffman.
"You're still such a fool..."
He could have simply resented Liana.
It would have been an easier path to think she had gone mad and followed the Demon King, and resent her for not saying anything.
But if not a fool, what was he, choosing to resent himself in order to understand her?
Liana grasped Cliffman's hand.
Liana held on tightly, her grip nearly crushing, but Cliffman felt the strength in her grasp was pitiful.
A powerful supernatural, but her physical strength was still lacking.
They had changed.
Both Liana and Cliffman had changed.
But there were things that remained unchanged.
After countless incidents, the fact that they still cherished each other had not changed.
"Being a fool has its good points."
"What are they...?"
“I knew I am still useless and weak, but... even if it was utter nonsense, I did the foolish thing of saying I wanted to see you…”
Cliffman squeezed the hand of Liana, who was holding his own.
"Like this, I got to see you again."
There was no reason for Liana to come see Cliffman.
He knew that too.
But he said it anyway, knowing that it made no sense.
That he wanted to see Liana.
Logically, he knew it was impossible. There was no reason for Liana to come see him.
Yet, he said it just in case.
Follow on Novᴇl-Onlinᴇ.cᴏmIt was foolish, but there was a slim chance.
In the end, the other party responded to his strange request.
And so, they got to see each other again.
Ultimately, they realized that even though they were both broken, they didn't blame each other.
One was blaming themselves, and the other felt sorry. They both knew that.
Foolish acts don't always lead to bad outcomes.
"Really... truly..."
At Cliffman's words, Liana's lips trembled slightly.
"You... as you've grown older... truly..."
Tears welled up in Liana's eyes again.
"You've become sentimental..."
Saying it made her want to throw up.
Her body shook as if she couldn't bear it.
But in the end, Liana laughed.
A laugh of pure joy.
It was her first laugh in three years.
"..."
"..."
My eyes met with the blockhead's.
"It... turned out well, right?"
"It went so well that I feel nauseous."
"Uh... yeah, it's a bit... like that..."
Cliffman.
That guy had become incredibly sentimental.
He hadn't been like that when I watched him as a cat.
No, maybe it was because Liana was in front of him that he was acting like that.
We didn't mean to eavesdrop in the first place.
Well, it was eavesdropping, but Harriet and I were watching from a distance just in case something went wrong.
In case Cliffman did something unexpected, we needed to stop him.
But seeing Liana's tearful appearance and Cliffman's excessive chatter...
Since we had been listening to their conversation through magic, both the blockhead and I felt quite nauseous.
"Anyway, it's fortunate... really fortunate."
Yes, as the blockhead said, it was truly fortunate.
What's the big deal if he's become sentimental? It's a great relief that nothing went wrong.
At first, I thought the situation was going awry, but in the end, Cliffman had those thoughts because Liana was precious to him.
So, he was grateful to Liana, who had come to see him after hearing that he wanted to see her.
Although it was sad for Liana to know that Cliffman wasn't blaming her but blaming himself, she couldn't help but be moved.
In the end, Cliffman confirmed that he valued Liana even more than she thought.
It was impossible to know what he was thinking when we watched him as a cat because he was so quiet.
But eventually, he spoke his true feelings in front of Liana.
"Actually, I was a bit nervous..."
Harriet's face turned red as she watched Liana, who was now comfortably chatting even with tear stains on her face, and the two who had started a somewhat normal conversation.
Nervous?
"… Do you like that sort of thing?"
"…?"
Do you like sentimental stuff?
"Why, do you want me to do it?"
At my words, the blockhead's brow furrowed.
I had never tried something like that before, but there wasn't anything I couldn't do if asked.
"Don't do it, seriously."
As my expression began to suggest some mischief, Harriet glared at me with narrowed eyes.
But then again.
It was a bit difficult to deliver a cheesy line without any buildup.
What should I say?
"Meeting you was the greatest fortune of my life."
That was the only thing I could think of!
However, Harriet tilted her head, not entirely satisfied with my unexpected statement.
"That's true, isn't it?"
"???"
"Am I wrong?"
No, that wasn't it.
I didn't know how to respond since it came out so abruptly.
"Ah, no... I mean, you're right, but..."
"Hmm..."
Well, I couldn't deny it was the greatest fortune...
But wouldn't it be a bit... strange for you to admit that with your own mouth?
Harriet approached me and crossed her arms.
Then, looking up at me, she grinned broadly.
"Isn't our adorable baby cat happy to have an owner like me?"
No.
No!
Excuse me!
Why are you better at this than I am!
"I... I was wrong..."
"Why are you acting up, then?"
Cheesy and embarrassing.
My heart almost stopped.
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