NovelEnglishMy Husband 374
WHAT'S STOPPING ME?
JOSH BACK TO PRESENT
My hands skimmed down Vivien's back as | kissed along the curve of her neck, tasting the sweet hint of wine on
her skin. She sighed softly, tilting her head to givemore access, her fingers threading through my hair as |
pushed her flimsy top off her shoulders, letting it fall to the floor.
She was warm and soft beneath my hands, her breath coming in shallow little gasps as | ran my palms down the
smooth curve of her waist, over the lace of her bra. | groaned against her throat, nipping at the delicate skin,
loving the way she shivered in response.
This was easy. This was right.
So why the hell did something infeel off?
Vivien shifted, pressing herself closer, her hips rolling against mine, and | nearly lost it. She was straddling me
now, her fingers trailing down my chest, nails dragging lightly over my abs.
| leaned back slightly, taking her in-the messy waves of her hair, the flush on her cheeks, the way her lips were
slightly swollen from kissing me.
God, she was gorgeous.
And | was ready. | was more than ready.
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STOPPING ME?
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So why the hell couldn't | move?
Vivien must have noticed my hesitation because she paused, her head tilting slightly. "Josh?"
| swallowed hard, my hands still resting on her waist. "Yeah?"
She searched my face, her fingers tracing along my jaw, her expression softening. "Are you okay?"
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| opened my mouth, ready to say yes, of course, because why the hell wouldn't | be? A beautiful woman was
practically naked in my lap, her lace barely hiding anything, and my entire body was screaming forto just
take-to stop thinking, to stop hesitating. But something in my chest tightened.
Something in my head whispered, Stop.
Vivien's brows pulled together, her hands sliding down to rest against my chest. "Josh..."
I ran a hand through my hair, forcing out a rough laugh, trying to play it off. "I-I don't know what's wrong with
me."
Her lips pressed together like she was considering something before she said, "You don't have to pretend with
me, you know."
| let out a slow breath, my hands gripping her waist a little tighter before | pulled back just enough to let her
slide off my lap and onto the couch beside me. She didn't move away completely-just enough to givespace.
| dragged a hand down my face, frustrated with myself. "Fuck, I'm sorry. | just-"
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"You don't have to be sorry." Her voice was gentle, no judgment in it, just quiet understanding.
That somehow made it worse.
| stared down at my hands, clenching and unclenching my fists. "This shouldn't be this hard," | muttered.
Vivien was quiet for a moment before she asked, "Is it Laura?"
My stomach clenched.
I should have lied. | should have said no.
But instead, | let my head fall back against the couch, exhaling sharply. "It's me," | admitted. "It's my fucking
head. | don't know what's wrong with me."
Vivien studiedfor a long moment, her fingers playing with the edge of the throw blanket draped over the
back of the couch. Then, finally, she said, "You loved her."
Vivien sia dit in past tense... Laura wasn't in my past. | still love her...
| let out a rough breath, my hands scrubbing over my face. "I did." | looked over at her, shaking my head. "I do.
But it's been two years, Vivien. Two years, and | should be able to-"L gestured vaguely between us, frustrated.
Vivien sighed, pulling her legs up onto the couch, facingcompletely. "Josh... | lost someone too."
| looked at her sharply.
She offered a small, sad smile. "I told you, remember? When |
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was twenty-three."
| nodded slowly. Her fiancé. The man she thought she would spend forever with.
"| know what it's like to wake up and
feel like there's this... ghost of
someone who PARAS, apymdre)’
Se feReay Gu ow what it's like
to move on and still feel like you're
betraying them, even when they
aren't here to be betrayed." My throat
tightened. The content is on
novelenglish.net! Read the latest
chapter there!
‘But | also know what it's like to want
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more, even when you're afraid to
admit it." She paused, her gaze
searching mine, Joghoutendt
broken Mure Srieving. And grief
doesn't just end because time
passes. It's not linear. It's messy and
confusing, and sometimes it shows
up in the middle of a perfectly good
moment and knocks the wind out of
you." The content is on
novelenglish.net! Read the latest
chapter there!
| swallowed hard, her words hittingin a place | hadn't wanted to acknowledge.
"You want to move on," she
continued. "That's d thing. (1)
ete nqrmall Gots your heart
just isn't as ready as your body is."
| exhaled sharply, dragging my hands through my hair. "So what the hell do | do?"
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