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I Should Have Just Died

Chapter 157
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Juliana knocked on the door, where she was hesitant again and again.

She stood at Seidrick Drick’s door, and she came back several times. She couldn’t understand what face she should have and what she had to say. Time and time again, she picked out and practiced what to say to her son, but she was always in the same place.

How could she dare to say anything about the child, who had now become ill from carrying the burdens of Cambridge alone? It seems as if her heart is torn into ten thousand pieces and disintegrates in the air. He has to put a knife to his body and cut out the lump inside.

She knew just by being told that the process would not be easy.

“Why do my children have to go through this?”

She couldn’t understand. It’s only Cambridge that has to get through this misfortune every time. Juliana sighed as she faced the door. She hadn’t slept well and couldn’t eat at all since he was diagnosed with the disease.

Ophelia comforted Juliana, but it was not heard. It disintegrated in the air without touching her at all. With all her heart, she had prayed to God for the happiness of her children, with all of Juliana’s heart, but God had not heard it.

Kendrick is dead, and Seidrick is ill. Ophelia and Alyssa are expected to take on Cambridge to replace Seidrick. And what if they get sick too? At this point, she would rather leave Cambridge and go to a quiet place.

Cambridge, which has always been shiny and proud, is now Juliana’s shackles and sin. The shackles that could shove her into the mud. It was when Juliana ended up standing there for hours and doing nothing.

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As the evening drew to a close, Alyssa appeared.

“….. Mother.”

Alyssa’s skinny face draws a warm smile. She is a child who shows a smile to Juliana no matter what. She smiled along with her now pretty daughter-in-law.

“…Alyssa.”

“Can I serve you a cup of tea?”

Alyssa asked Juliana. In fact, she had come to Seidrick because she needed someone to talk to. She thinks it would be better to speak to him and work. But Juliana also seemed desperately in need of someone. It reminded her of her failure to take good care of Juliana amid Seidrick’s pain, her own miserable reality, and in this sinful situation both inside and outside the country.

At Alyssa’s suggestion, Juliana nodded her head.

“That would be nice.”

As if she were running away, Juliana left the place.

It was her office where Alyssa took Juliana. She talked to Sasha, and she served hot tea for the two of them. It was a tea that could be comforting in this situation. The scent wasn’t strong, but something subtle lingered on the tip of her nose.

It brought calmness so that even the boiling heart could subside. Juliana took a sip of the tea.

“…it’s a tea that was delivered to the royal family.”

“Such a precious thing…!”

Alyssa laughed awkwardly.

“Does everything that enters the royal family precious? It’s not true, mother? They have long since lost their right to be honored.

Juliana quietly fell into her thoughts at the straightforward and rational words.

It seemed that Alyssa’s hostility toward the royal family was more profound than she thought. She also knew what Alyssa, Ophelia, Seidrick, and Dania were doing, even though Juliana had been shutting her ears to world affairs for quite some time as the Grand Madam of Cambridge.

They were moving with one accord to overthrow the royal family.

And she knew the cause of the noise outside.

The mind that was focused on Seidrick seems to be a little ventilated. Juliana opened her lips calmly.

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“…Alyssa. Do you really think the royal family should disappear?”

“Yes. I think that’s right. Even without them, we’ve been doing well so far. The royal family is having a negative impact on society.”

Alyssa said firmly.

“However, it is true that they have supported the kingdom for a long time. They were the pride and spiritual support of the people. Thinking about it.”

Juliana wet her lips.

“They’re a terrible royal family! What are you saying? Why haven’t they thought they don’t need the royal family?”

“…Mother, I…’

“It’s proof that they still need a fence— not the nobles, but the common people. Of course, I agree that the royal family has lost its function. But it’s too early now.”

Alyssa bowed her head.

The truth, which she had been ignoring for so long, seemed to hit her. It’s still too early. It struck Alissa that the people needed them to build a fence, no matter how ugly the royal family was.

She was aware.