Florida Man's General Store in Cultivation World-Novel



Chapter 144 – Florida Man Accidentally Evaporated Entire Town by Shooting Fireworks While Parachuting. One of the Fireworks Was Genuine 100-ton TNT.

FLOP-FLOP-FLOP

In the custom-made cosplay suit, Leo waddled north. As he didn't tell anybody about the suit, disciples and elders that had been working on the junkyard and Wu Buyi's alchemy workshop stared at Leo in confusion. Even thunder unicorns and the nightmare horses were confused.

Because of the system's suit, nobody could sense his aura. Thus, he thought of this creature as one of the weird things that Leo had created.

Everybody sneaked glances at the local mannequins. As Leo made them, they believed these automatons could recognize the other creations of the same creator.

Their guesses were half correct. The mannequins could tell that Leo was inside that suit. As soon as he got close, they stopped working to salute him.

Seeing the mannequin's reaction, everybody stopped being on guard of the weird suit.

"That must be Lord Florida Man. The golems are showing respect to him."

"Yeah. What is Lord Florida Man doing?"

Tiger Swordsman found Leo's eccentric behavior amusing. He stopped practicing shooting and followed Leo.

Leo ignored his robots and kept going north. Soon, he left the domain boundary, heading further toward the unexplored land. He didn't notice that Tiger Swordsman tagged along with him.

As walking took too long, Leo began skipping and leaping. His bulky suit hopped like a 2D character in Nintendo games, ignoring the laws of physics.

Tiger Swordsman brought out his flying sword and rode on it. He kept up with Leo's speed without bothering him.

After traveling for a few minutes, both men discovered an area with dense pink fog.

Being cautious, Tiger Swordsman stopped proceeding forward. As for Leo, he ignored everything and kept hopping into the pink mist.

"…"

Tiger Swordsman frowned. His instinct cried that he shouldn't go any further. Thus, he let out a long sigh.

'I should tell the others about this mist. Lord Florida Man might have already detected it, which might be why he is wearing that strange suit. It's too dangerous here.'

The muscular elder turned around and returned to the domain. He would tell Hua Jiashan and Dongfang Mei about the pink mist later.

.

.

As Leo hopped deeper into the misty forest, the visor, which he had made, started to get foggy. Leo narrowed his eyes as he noticed the movement on the clothes.

Branches of mushroom spore rapidly grew and latched on Leo's visor. Leo even heard creaking sounds of small objects, which were made by the growing mushrooms trying to eat the suit.

Aside from the growing mushrooms, the wind around Leo was quite strong. He felt like he was near the eye of a tornado as the mist circulated too fast.

"Hmm."

Not allowing the mushrooms to break his new suit, Leo kicked the ground and leaped 10 kilometers in one jump. While he was in the sky, he got out of the mist and got a clear vision of the surroundings.

The mist was like a mass of clouds that got glued to the ground. They slowly moved from north to south, but they were caught by a whirlpool under Leo.

In the eye of the whirlpool was a giant chomper plant, aka Cat. She emitted a yellow electric current, which had the same characteristic as the yellow tribulation lightning bolts.

Leo smirked and glanced above him. Above his head was a small yellow cloud, which was about to disperse as it used up its power.

"Damn Cat. So, you're here nom-noming mushrooms? Well, good for you. At least, you aren't stealing my food."

Leo looked forward, searching for the source of the mist.

Further north, a city wall was on the horizon. Leo estimated that he was about to reach another city north of Magpie City and his domain.

Soon, his leap momentum ended, and he fell to the ground. Leo leaned forward and bent his knees.

BOOM

As he had done this a million times, Leo landed and planted his two feet firmly on the ground. His kneecaps got slightly itchy as the suit was added to the weight.

Leo put more force into his legs and was about to jump again. But as he looked up, a shadow silhouette of a man charged toward him.

As the silhouette got closer, Leo got a clear vision of the man.

It was not a man. It was a humanoid creature with a large mushroom replacing his eyes, nose, and everything above his mouth.

"REEEEEEEEEEEE!!"

The mushroom zombie screamed at Leo and jumped at him. He bit the rainbow suit.

CRACK

Unfortunately for the zombie, its teeth cracked as it failed to break the spacesuit.

Leo pursed his lips in frustration. He planned to test this suit against real sweet dream mushrooms, but an idiot scratched it. He touched the side of his bulky spacesuit and ordered it to shapeshift.

The side of his suit softened, allowing Leo to extend his arms into them and create rubber-like armguards and gloves. However, Leo made it more creative.

Instead of fixing the arm and hand sizes to fit his, he ordered his suit to distort the arms and hands. He made the gloves bigger, which was as large as the entire spacesuit.

Using his large hands, Leo slapped the zombie like how he slapped some mosquitos in summer.

PA!

The zombie splashed blood, guts, and flesh all over. Some of them got on Leo's visor.

Leo wiped the bloodstain off his visor. However, he took too much time. More mushroom zombies emerged from the mist and jumped him.

"Oh, boy. Am I in a zombie apocalypse world or a cultivation world? Make up your mind!"

PA!

PA!

As Leo was wary of the mushrooms, he chose not to fight while wearing the Among Us cosplay spacesuit. Using his suit's large hands, he smacked, punched, and slapped zombies that came in his way.

.

One hour later, the zombies kept on coming. Piles of innards and human flesh scattered throughout the pine tree forest along with the rapidly growing mushrooms.

Sweet dream mushrooms devoured the blood and corpses of victims. They multiplied and covered every inch of the mutated pine trees.

Leo frowned while he scanned through his surrounding area. Noticing the mushrooms on the trees spitting spore, he thought of his domain. He imagined how it would have affected the workers had these zombie mushrooms infected them.

"Tsk! Should I burn this entire place down? I didn't create these mushrooms! I'm not responsible for this!"

Leo stopped killing random zombies. He jumped up and took off his spacesuit's gloves. After throwing the gloves into his spatial rings, Leo clenched his fists.

His cancer cells reacted to Leo's will. They poured fire and lightning essence into his hands. Black electric current leaked out from his skin.

Leo glanced at his fist. Worrying that he might destroy the planet, he decreased his power by a few gears.

"Yellow is enough. Black is overkill. I don't want to destroy this world, my cells."

The black electric current changed to yellow. Sensing that his Qi and essence returned to his bloodstream, he was relieved.

Leo's fists were set in yellow flame. The fire didn't harm him. On the contrary, it added a new power to his punches.

Letting himself fall, Leo descended. He threw his left fist and hit the ground!

BOOM!

The ground cracked and collapsed as if a massive meteor collided with the planet. The land parted way, creating a massive crater and explosion shockwave.

Yellow lightning from Leo's left fist zapped every zombie within 10 kilometers. Yellow fire followed and disintegrated everything, including plants, mushrooms, and zombies.

The wave of zombies got petrified first. Then, they crumbled into piles of molten rocks.

"MYAAAA!!"

While the flame expanded, Leo heard the scream of Cat behind him. He turned around and looked up from the crater. Then, he saw the massive body of Cat over his head.

Cat's roots and vines were on fire, but the yellow flame didn't harm her. However, she couldn't extinguish them as the flame reacted to Cat's lightning Qi and her yellow electric current.

As if Cat was aware of the culprit behind the shockwave and the flame, she jumped from the previous spot and landed on top of Leo's head.

BONK

Getting hit by the massive tree trunk and the massive roots of Cat, Leo groaned. He still didn't notice that Cat's humanoid torso on top of the plant had grown a lot.

"Who asked you to play here? Go home!"

"Nom-Nom Meow, Munya!" Cat complained as Leo interrupted her meal.

"Don't MUNYA me! I'm here to purge the mist and the zombies!"

"Meow, Meow!!" Again, Cat bickered that everything was his fault in the first place.

"Not my fault. These mushrooms aren't mine."

"Nom-Nom Meow?"

"Collect them? I'm actually planning to keep some of the mushrooms to grow on some planets later, but these stupid zombies are in the way. Hey, instead of eating mushroom spore, how about you eat those zombies and big mushrooms instead? I need to remove the fog and the wild mushrooms before they infect my slaves."

"Nom-Nom?"

"…"

"NOM-NOM MEOW?!"

"FINE! NOM-NOM AS MUCH AS YOU WANT IF YOU CAN! Seriously, I'm gonna clear the zombies up north. You can stay here and eat the corpses!"

"Nom-Nom Meow <3"

Cat jumped away from Leo's head and swung her vines, swiping burnt pine trees and ashes into her mouth. Using her roots as legs, she crept like a massive spider, menacingly stomping and kicking dirt to the sky at the speed of thunder.

Leo scratched his head and climbed out from the crater. After getting back on the surface, he looked at the bottom again.

It was roughly a kilometer deep and ten kilometers wide. The other edge of the crater also reached his domain's northern boundary.

"Oh, boy. Those peeps are going to complain about this. Welp, not my fault."

Leo maintained his element essence in his right fist as he hadn't used it yet. He gazed toward the north and kicked the ground, leaping toward the Dragon Mantis City.

Looking below, Leo bitterly laughed. The massive provincial-sized city was conquered by the mushrooms. Even some of the zombies below were devoured by the growing monsters.

Traveling deeper, Leo found the massive pink fog gathering in the center of the city. The mist spiraled into a tower, slowly ascending to the sky.

In the middle of the spiral, Leo's infrared eyes pierced through the foggy clouds and found a golden mushroom tree. Around the spiral tower of the tree, its roots and foundation were connected to other grown sweet dream mushrooms on top of every roof and house.

The golden branch seemed to be an evolved mushroom or its overmind, judging from its roots and the movements of the mist.

As Leo approached closer, a new silhouette of a cultivator with a disfigured head shot out from the pink mist. It flew toward Leo, holding a long sword.

"REEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!"

Hua Guanhai cackled. As if he retained some of his memory, the zombie slashed at Leo while it activated its dao avatar ability.

A spirit of another mushroom zombie appeared behind Leo, carrying an energy sword in its hands. It thrust the sword to pierce Leo from the back.

SWUA

SWUA

The swords connected!

CLANK

However, the physical sword of the real body broke in half. As for the energy sword, it failed to penetrate through Leo's spacesuit. Instead of piercing through it, the suit absorbed its energy.

Getting ambushed out of nowhere, Leo knitted his brows.

"Hey, what's your problem?"

Annoyed, Leo used his right hand, which was still coated with yellow electric current and yellow flame, to seize Hua Guanhai's neck.

CRACK

Mimicking an imposter cracking a crewmate's neck, Leo twisted Hua Guanhai's head 360 degrees. Then, the yellow lightning and yellow flame turned the zombie into ash.

FWHOOSH

As its master died, the dao avatar spirit behind Leo also vanished.

"REEEEEEEEEEEEE!!"

As if the death of Hua Guanhai awakened something below, Leo heard multiple loud screams of the living mushroom zombies. A few seconds later, a thousand of them jumped out from the mist and charged at Leo in the sky.

"Whoops."

Leo widely grinned as he found the scene funny. He reignited his fire and lightning fist in his right hand while he slowly descended to the middle of the horde.

The thousand zombies swarmed Leo in every direction as he fell to the ground inside the city. But as he landed, the fist hit the ground and caused another explosion.

The second nuke erupted, and the shockwave disintegrated everything in its path into dust. Zombies were blasted away and burnt to ash while buildings crumbled into dust. As for the mushroom, the mist, and the spore, they vanished into nothingness.

.

.

A few minutes later, the dust subsided. Leo took off his spacesuit and patted his clothes.

Climbing out of the second crater, Leo inspected the infected city. He then checked the condition of the evolved mushroom.

Everything around Leo turned into a brown barren land, filled with dirt and dust. However, the golden tree still stood tall, and it continued producing pink mist.

"Huh?"

Leo was surprised that the strange spiral thing was intact after getting hit by his light punch. He stared at the branch for a moment before he came up with an idea.

"Can I contain this thing and grow it somewhere else?"