NovelEnglishChapter 109
Christiana’s POV.
| had tried to stay calm, but it was useless. Alex had invaded my mind, leavingrestless, pacing around my
apartment as if moving could shake off the weight of him. His eyes....haunted, broken...when he sawin
Daniel's arms, they haunted me. The man who always had something to say, who could cut you down with his
words or charm you with a smile, had been silent. And it wasn't just the silence. It was the way he looked at me,
like his soul had been ripped from his body.
| couldn't sit still any longer.
Before | even knew what | was doing, | grabbed my keys and stormed out, my heart pounding in my chest. | had
to find him. The thought of him drowning in whatever darkness had taken him down gnawed at me, even though
| despised him... hated him for how he madefeel, for never lettingforget.
After what felt like hours of searching, | finally spotted him through the glass walls of a bar. He was hunched over
the counter, his back to the door, and James, his ever-loyal P.A., stood beside him. From the empty bottles
scattered around, it was clear he was drunk...very drunk. | pressed a hand to my chest, trying to calm the
unease that gripped me, but it was no use. The sight of him like that hitharder than | expected.
Quickly, | walked in, after puffing out a heavy breath.
And then | stood there for a moment, frozen, watching. Then | heard him, his voice, slurred but still unmistakably
his.
“I know,” he muttered, taking another swig. “I saw the way she looked at him. She never looked atlike that.
Never.”
| clenched my fists. He was talking about me.
My breath hitched in my throat as he suddenly turned, as if sensing my presence. His eyes found mine, while |
was standing there, and for a second, everything stopped. The world around us faded away, and it was just him
and me. His eyes...God, his eye...were filled with so much pain, and beneath all that drunken state, there was
love. | hated it. | hated how much I could still feel it.
“Christiana,” he was shocked for sseconds upon seeingthere, and | knew it was because | was the last
person he was expecting to see at that moment.
He stumbled to his feet, knocking the empty bottles aside.
| marched over to him, ignoring the curious stares from the other patrons. My chest was tight, emotions swirling,
couldn't decide if | was angry or just heartbroken.
and
|
“What the hell do you think you're doing?” | snapped, yanking the bottle out of his hand and slamming it on the
counter. He chuckled, his voice low and thick with alcohol. “You're so beautiful, you know that?” His eyes roamed
over me, lingering in a way that made my skin crawl, but not because it was unwanted...because | hated how
much power he still had over me. “Where's Daniel? Hm? Still comforting you?”
| narrowed my eyes, fury bubbling up inside me. “You're a fool, Alex. A complete fool.”
His smile faltered for a moment before he laughed again, a hollow, bitter sound. “Yeah... | guess | am.” He
Follow on NovᴇlEnglish.nᴇtleaned closer, and I could smell the alcohol on his breath. “But look at you. Always so damn perfect,”
“Shut up, Alex, | hissed. “You don’t know what you're talking about.”
“Oh, don’t I?” His gaze darkened, and he looked atlike | was both his salvation and his ruin. “I saw the way
he looked at you. Daniel... he’s in love with you. | could see it. Did he touch you?” His words were sharp now,
each one hittinglike a knife. “Your hands, your body?”
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11:10 Fri, Oct 257.
Chapter 109
| froze, my heart pounding in my ears. “What the hell are you talking about?”
read.
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Alex laughed, shaking his head. “Did he touch you with his fucking mouth, Christiana?” His voice rose, and he
grabbed my arm, his grip tight but not painful. “Did he?!”
5
“Stop!” | yelled, pulling my arm free. “Just stop, Alex! You're drunk, and you don’t know what you're saying.”
There was a moment of silence between us, the air thick with tension. James shifted uncomfortably beside us,
clearly not knowing what to do. | could feel his eyes on me, but I couldn't look away from Alex. The hurt in his
eyes was unbearable.
“Why are you here?” His voice was softer now, almost pleading. “You're good at avoiding me, Christiana. Good at
disregarding everything I've tried to do, at makingfeel like shit.”
His words hitharder than I'd expected, leavingmomentarily speechless. | opened my mouth to say
something, but nothing cout. | hated him. | hated him so much, but seeing him like this...broken, hurting
because of me...was more than | could bear.
He stared at me, his gaze searching mine, and for a moment, it felt like the world had stopped again. The love in
his eyes, mixed with all that pain, was too much.
| couldn’t speak. | couldn't breathe.
It was too much.
| stood there, staring at Alex, my heart pounding in my chest. His words were so raw, so full of hurt...left me
rattled. | couldn’t just stand there anymore. Something insidebroke, and before | could stop myself, |
stepped forward, closing the distance between us. James took a step back, awkwardly shifting his gaze between
us, clearly sensing the tension that was about to explode.
“Alex,” | said softly, standing directly in front of him now. My voice was low but he heard it. He looked up at me,
his drunken haze flickering with something...something deep and wounded.
He opened his mouth to speak, but | cut him off, my frustration boiling over. “You don’t get to do this. You don’t
get to makefeel like I'm the one who's ruined everything when you're the one who walked away.”
His eyes narrowed slightly, and | could see the storm brewing behind them. “I never walked away,” he slurred,
leaning back on the barstool, his gaze still locked on mine. “You... you pushedout. You were always pushing
| scoffed, crossing my arms tightly over my chest, trying to keep myself together. “Don’t twist this. You know
that’s not true.”
He shook his head, his expression hardening. “You think | didn’t see it? How you'd pull back every tthings
got real? Every t| tried to get closer, you'd build a wall. And now...now you've moved on, with him.”
| clenched my fists, shaking my head in disbelief. “You have no idea what you're talking about.”
Before he could respond, the lights in the bar flickered once, then went out entirely. A collective gasp spread
through the room, the sudden darkness swallowing us whole. For a moment, there was only silence, the air thick
with tension and the smell of spilled liquor.
| barely had tto react when | felt a hand reach out, grasping my arm. Alex, even in his drunken state, had
foundin the dark. His fingers were strong but not forceful, a protective gesture that sent an unexpected jolt
through me.
“Christiana,” he muttered, his voice low and rough, laced with something that | couldn't quite name. “Stay
close.”
| stood frozen, my breath caught in my throat. The bar's usual buzz of conversation was now filled with murmurs
and footsteps as people fumbled in the dark. But all | could focus on was the warmth of his hand on my arm and
the way my pulse quickened at his touch.
I didn’t want this. | didn’t want to care about him like this, to feel anything for him. Yet, here | was, drawn to him
even when
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111
everything inscreamed to stay away.
When the lights flickered back on, Alex's hand was still on my arm. His eyes found mine once more, and for a
moment, everything else fell away. His gaze was soft but filled with the weight of everything unsaid. “You never
answered me,” he said, his voice hoarse. “Why are you here?”
| swallowed hard, trying to form the
words, but my throat felt tight. mn
sont
Because | cQuignt { it
ata my voice barely a whisper.
« ) : :
| couldn't sit there, knowing you
: . ) oh ”
were... like this. It's killing me, Alex.
His lips curled into a faint, bitter smile, but his eyes stayed locked on mine, not blinking. “I'm already dead,
Christiana. You just don’t want to see it.”
His words hitlike a punch to the gut, and before | could stop myself, | stepped closer, lowering my voice so
only he could hear. “Stop talking like that. You're not dead.”
He laughed softly, the sound hollow and broken. “Feels like it.” He reached out again, his hand brushing against
Follow on Novᴇl-Onlinᴇ.cᴏmmine before dropping to his side. “Especially when | see you with him. Daniel.”
| shook my head, exasperated, trying to find the right words, but the emotions tangled in my chest. “It’s not
what you think. He was just comforting me.”
Alex raised an eyebrow, his gaze darkening with mockery. “Comforting you? Is that what they call it now?”
“Don’t twist this,” | snapped, my voice sharp with anger. “You have no right...”
« : ”
| have every right!” he shouted,
slamming his hand on the bar. The
sound echoed, drawing» fewndre
etre :
stares. either of us cared. “You
q anf) q
have no idea what it's been like...
watching you, knowing | lost you.
: PY) ” :
Knowing it's my fault.” The content is
on novelenglish.net! Read the latest
chapter there!
“Is that why you walked away like that this afternoon?” My voice cracked despite my best efforts to stay
composed. “You couldn't even utter a word towhen | spoke to you.”
He looked at me, his eyes softening just for a second before the alcohol took hold again. “Maybe | thought you
were better off without me. Maybe | thought | wasn’t enough.”
“That's not for you to decide,” | whispered, my heart aching with the weight of his confession.
James cleared his throat awkwardly, clearly uncomfortable with the moment. But Alex's eyes never left mine.
“Why are you still here?” Alex asked, his voice quieter
filled with disbelief. “Why don’t you just leave?”
| took a deep breath, my chest tightening. “Because | can't.”
He stared at me, his expression
unreadable, it was of anger, love, and
confusion in his YR End@ Pat’
moment realize that no matter
how hard | tried, no matter how much
| hated him for the pain he caused
P 8
me, | couldn't walk away from him.
Not yet. Not like this.
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