Damn Reincarnation

The first thing Ciel saw when she opened her eyes was Eugene’s face. She simply blinked a few times when she saw how his eyes, which appeared indifferent at first glance, contained subtle concern.

“Was I in the way?” She spoke without thinking.

She didn’t know why she had been sleeping until now. Her memory had cut off at a strange place. She remembered how Princess Scalia attacked in a frenzy, how Dior blocked her, and… how they had exchanged fierce blows with each other. Afterward, Dior had collapsed for reasons unknown, even though he had not suffered any cuts. Then, Princess Scalia had raised her head and….

She didn’t remember what happened afterward. Nothing. She tried her best to remember, but it just wouldn’t come to her.

“No, you weren’t,” Eugene answered calmly.

“You’re lying,” Ciel accused.

She could see Cyan standing a little distance away when she turned her head. His eyes were bloodshot, and he was staring at the far side of the snowfield. She could see how his jaw and neck muscles were flexed because of how hard he was clenching his teeth. Ciel knew exactly what her brother was feeling right now, and she could sympathize with it.

The two of them were twins, and they had been born into the prestigious Lionheart family. The two were quite talented and skilled. The only problem was that they had been born into an era together with a monstrous talent. If they had been brought up normally without rushing and had never been caught up in unexpected, impossible events….

“You don’t need to be considerate,” said Ciel as she stood up. The Phantom Rain Sword Javel, which she had been holding right before she fell asleep, was resting in its sheath and hanging on her waist. Ciel couldn’t help but laugh at the sight. “Showing that kind of consideration only hurts me more. It’s fine. I already know how ridiculously strong you are.”

She had stubbornly insisted on crossing the snowfield with Eugene, never imagining that something dangerous would take place. After all, what could possibly threaten them? An ambush of monsters? That couldn’t be considered a threat, could it? Ciel and Cyan were sitting at Four Stars of the White Flame Formula, and even throughout the Lionheart’s long history, not many had reached Four Stars at the age of twenty-one. This was an undeniable fact.

It meant that they could pride themselves on how strong they were. So they mistakenly presumed their safety. Even forgetting the fact that Eugene was a literal monster, this journey couldn’t pose much of a threat to them. If a monster stood in their way, Ciel could simply swing her sword in his stead. She had been looking forward to hearing obvious compliments from Eugene, like, ‘Wow, you’ve improved a lot.’

“Wait a minute,” Eugene called out.

Ciel felt disgusted by herself. She knew exactly what kind of expression she was adorning now, but she couldn’t possibly predict her next change in facial expression. She wasn’t familiar with what she was feeling, and the same was true for her expression as well. So Ciel jerked around and turned her back to Eugene.

‘I’m pathetic.’

It had been sudden and unavoidable. It had been inevitable that Ciel was absolutely useless and helpless in that situation, that she had collapsed too quickly, serving only as an obstruction or a hindrance to Eugene. However, the proud lady of the Lionheart clan did not want to accept the inevitable fact. Her pride was hurt, and she felt absolutely humiliated.

She knew it was impossible for her to get ahead of Eugene, but she didn’t want to get in his way. Even if she couldn’t stand proudly by his side, she wanted to keep pace with him from behind. But what was this? This was far from keeping pace with him. Instead, she had only gotten in his way. She couldn’t stand herself for being so pathetic and weak.

“Ciel,” Eugene called out.

Unfortunately, Ciel wasn’t in a position to respond. She was so desperately trying to keep her wobbly lips under control that she didn’t even want to answer him. She felt her eyes quivering and her vision blurring, as well as her nose tingling.

“Don’t look at me. Don’t even come near me,” Ciel managed to say while suppressing her sniffles.

The more she thought about it, the more pathetic she felt. In fact, it was the first time in her life that she felt this miserable and helpless. Ciel approached Cyan while snuffing the shivering of her shoulders.

Cyan had opened his eyes a little earlier than her. He had already moved past the stage of despairing in humiliation and now was feeling enraged at his own weakness. Cyan removed his gaze from the other side of the snowfield and glanced at Ciel’s face. His sister was shedding tears with pursued lips.

As her older brother, he wanted to say something to cool or comfort her heart, but… he couldn’t. He was the same as her, unable to part his lips. He knew that he would only cry out in anger if he relinquished control of his mouth. In the end, Cyan only patted his sister’s shoulder without saying anything, but that was enough for his baby sister. Ciel sobbed silently for a while, and Cyan quenched his sadness and anger while clenching his teeth.

Eugene didn’t say anything to the twins. Had they held him back? He didn’t think so. It was essential to be mindful of who they had been against — Noir Giabella, the Queen of the Night Demons. She wasn’t an opponent with whom a battle could be fought in the first place, and even Eugene himself had not attempted to fight against her.

However, if they had been forced into a fight, Eugene couldn’t have left Ciel and Cyan unprotected, and Eugene didn’t try to deny this fact either. Even if they did not share any blood, they were siblings who had known each other for nearly ten years. Once the two of them somewhat regained their composure, Eugene explained what had happened. When the two heard about the Queen of the Night Demons, they couldn’t do much but stare with their jaws wide agape.

“So… Duke Noir Giabella… of Helmuth took control of Princess Scalia’s body to say hello?”

“Yes.”

“But it was all a joke?”

“That’s what she said, anyway. Well… it feels like… shit, but no one died, right? So it means that this really was just a joke for that crazy woman, nothing that could be considered significant.”

Eugene felt neither the heart to defend Noir Giabella nor the right reason. But he had to state the facts. Yes, it had been an offensive, incomprehensible act, but for Noir, this had been nothing more than a playful greeting.

“…She must have been quite curious about us. Why, the founder fought directly with the Queen of the Night Demons, and… you two are set to become the next head of the Lionheart family as the direct descendants,” said Eugene.

“You don’t have to say such words to make me feel better. The Queen of the Night Demons was here to see you,” Cyan said with a snort.

The world knew Eugene as the second coming of the Great Vermouth, and there was no way Cyan was oblivious to this fact. He chewed on his lips while experiencing complicated emotions.

“So…” Cyan said after taking a moment to cool himself off. “Was Duke Giabella satisfied after seeing you?”

“What?” asked Eugene.

“I asked if she was satisfied with you,” repeated Cyan.

He was staring at Eugene with calm eyes. Hidden deep beneath his gaze was a mixture of immaturity, humiliation from being disregarded, as well as resentment towards his own deficiencies. However, he was managing to hide his true, squirming emotions by taking on a dignified look.

“I’m not sure if she was satisfied, per se, but she did say she liked me,” Eugene answered smoothly.

“That’s enough,” said Cyan with a nod. “It’s better to gain recognition than to be ignored by an enemy of our great founder.”

“That’s a commendable thing to say,” Eugene complimented in a rare fashion.

“Did I say something strange?” asked Cyan.

“No, you didn’t say anything strange. Anyways, this event… well… I don’t think there’s a reason to tell anyone. No one was hurt, and there’s no need to let things grow out of our control, right?” said Eugene.

Both Cyan and Ciel nodded in agreement. They both were convinced that Noir Giabella was a maniac and that they could not possibly understand her with common sense.

“What about Princess Scalia?” asked Cyan. They had moved Princess Scalia and Dior to the side after they fell to the snow, but neither had yet to regain consciousness. “We can’t possibly leave them like this, right? They’ll freeze to death if we do nothing.”

“Then are you going to take them with us?” asked Ciel.

“Why would we?” Eugene asked. “We can let them get to Lehain on their own while we go our own way and—”

“No.” Ciel shook her head, interrupting Eugene. “My brother and I will go with Princess Scalia.”

“What?” Eugene was dumbfounded.

“You’re going to the Grand Hammer Canyon of Lehainjar anyways,” continued Ciel. Her eyes were still red, but her voice was back to normal. She continued with a brave smile as if she had never cried in the first place. “In the first place, it was you, not us, that His Majesty Aman Ruhr recommended going to the Grand Hammer Canyon. To be honest, I’m already sick of this snowfield. I don’t want to climb any more mountains without reason, nor do I want to go to this canyon. And training with you on the road….”

Unfortunately, she couldn’t bear to lie about that as well and trailed off. After a moment of hesitation, she shrugged and laughed. “Well, that wasn’t too bad. But I would rather be relaxing my body and mind. Sleds and wagons… sound quite nice. I wanted to travel like that while sipping on hot chocolate or coffee with you, but now I don’t even care about that. I just can’t wait to get to Lehain and get into that famous hot spring.”

“Hey, you….”

Before Eugene could start reprimanding her, Ciel continued in a firm tone, “I won’t change my mind no matter what you say, and the same goes for my brother. So, just tell me to do what I want. Ah, you’re not worried about us, are you? It’s fine, it’s fine. Even if Princess Scalia wasn’t in her right mind, Sir Dior was alright, right? They must have been wandering the snowfield knowing the way to Lehain.”

Not knowing what to say, Eugene just stayed quiet.

“And you know, even if something dangerous happens, it will be while we climb Lehainjar, not in this snowfield. I don’t want to get caught up in something like this again, and I don’t want to get in your way either.”

“Don’t say stupid things,” rebuked Eugene.

“I’m saying these things because I’m not stupid. I know my place. Why? Do you feel sorry for me after hearing what I said? If that’s the case, I hate it. I don’t want to be pitied by you.”

Ciel jumped off the ground with a snort. Then she approached Princess Scalia and Dior, who were still lying unconscious on the ground. “How long are they going to sleep for? Shouldn’t they get up on their own since we’ve waited this long?”

“Let’s carry them on our backs,” Cyan said, standing up after Ciel.

Before Eugene could stop him, Cyan approached Dior and placed him on his back. Ciel naturally followed suit and carried Scalia on her back.

“They’ll eventually wake up once we get going.”

Eugene tried to dissuade them. “Hey, why are you guys in such a hurry? Just wait until they wake up and….”

“I don’t want to be with you anymore because I feel embarrassed and humiliated,” said Ciel.

“When I see your face, I feel like pulling all of my hair out because of anger.” Cyan chimed in, nodding.

“If you hold me back, I’ll hate you for the rest of my life,” spat Ciel with bloodshot eyes. Eugene could find no words to speak.

“See you in Lehain,” said Cyan before taking off. In the end, the two of them departed carrying Dior and Scalia. Eugene stood in place for a while, staring at their shrinking backs.

“Are you worried?”

The voice that interrupted him was in a rather sarcastic tone. Eugene turned to look at Kristina. Judging from the crescent shape her eyes took and her smile, it was Anise.

“Of course I’m worried,” responded Eugene.

“Is it because you experienced childhood once again after being reincarnated? Hamel, it seems to me that you are more humane than you were in our past life,” said Anise.

“I was filled with compassion since my previous life,” said Eugene.

“Well, I can’t deny it. Anyways, I think it’s a relief. Those twins… don’t hate you. They envy you, but they aren’t jealous. Rather, they are there for you and want to be of help,” said Anise.

“I know. I found that very cute and proud, so I taught them this and that, which is unlike me. However, Cyan and Ciel are still too young.”

“I don’t think age matters much. All of us were quite young three hundred years ago.” With a faint smile, Anise traced the holy symbol in the air. “…Of course, those twins are different from us. We were just as young as them, but we were born different and experienced different things. But Hamel, surprisingly, humans are quick to adapt and change. If a few non-trivial opportunities present themselves, and if they have the will to move forward, then… humans can cause miracles. Just like we did.”

Eugene listened silently as Anise continued.

“Hamel. You spent your childhood with those twins, but with the memories of your past life, you couldn’t have shared the same experiences with the twins at the same young age. That is why you have been treating them like children all along,” said Anise.

“That’s right.”

“No, but they are no longer children. They want to stand on their own, and they don’t want to rely on others. Those twins possess the will to do so, and they clearly felt angry at failing to help today. They despise themselves for being weak. What they experienced today, and what they’ve experienced thus far, the emotions they feel with each event will act as a turning point for them,” Anise concluded her explanation.

She wasn’t only talking about Ciel and Cyan either. It was also meant for Kristina, who was quietly listening on the other side of consciousness. It was the same for Kristina. She also was forced to come to terms with her bitter weakness, and she also desired to use it as a spring to overcome further hardships.

“If you cross the river of death,” Eugene said after a long sigh. He stood up before continuing. “If you survive at the brink of death, if you continue to struggle to survive, even at the cost of having to kill others, then yes. It’ll temper a person and make them stronger. Anise, you and I know this fact all too well because we lived in those times.”

“Yes, that’s true.”

“But the time we live in now is peaceful. I…. If it’s possible…. No, you’re right. I am still treating Cyan and Ciel like children. But if possible, I would like them to live out their lives in this peaceful era without having to dance with death,” continued Eugene.

“That’s your selfish desire,” replied Anise. She was adamant in this respect. “We do not choose the era we live in, and it’s not something we can change as we wish. As humans, we are weak and light. We have no choice but to go with the grand scheme of things, the bigger flow. In particular, those twins are the descendants of Sir Vermouth. As long as they bear the name Lionheart, they have no choice but to stand at the forefront of the turbulent times.”

Eugene couldn’t deny her words.

“Whether they choose to walk the tightrope with death, or… whether they choose to abandon everything and run away, is not a matter for you to decide, Hamel. The fate of man must be his own and his alone,” said Anise.

“They might cry out because they don’t want to but still get caught up in things they didn’t want,” retorted Eugene.

“If they don’t want to get caught up in things, they can simply run away. If they choose to get caught up in compromises and their own stubbornness, it’s also something they need to deal with on their own,” answered Anise.

“What you say sounds like self-torture,” commented Eugene.

“Then you heard right. Three hundred years ago, I did not take my destiny as my own. I did not run away, but I didn’t want to go forward either. I was stupid, and I couldn’t disobey the orders of the Holy Empire, which was cleverly disguised as the Will of Light. I was stupid. I saw countless deaths, thoroughly experienced my own weakness and unspeakable horrors, and despised myself for not running away,” Anise said before rising to her feet.

She smiled while looking down at Hamel, who remained seated. “But in the end, I was the one to make the final decision. I chose to follow Sir Vermouth of my own volition. By my will, I crossed the Devildom with you, Sienna, Molon, and Sir Vermouth. And by my will, I took my life. I was able to change like that because…. Haha, because of meaningful events and the will to act. It was because of these things.”

“And you walked the shore of the river of death many times as well,” Eugene reminded her.

“Yes, that’s right. Anyways, what I want to tell you is simple. If you really care for your siblings, do not treat them like children. Please respect their willingness to act,” concluded Anise.

“It’s been a long time since I last heard one of your lectures.” Eugene stood up with a bitter smile. He turned his head but could no longer see Cyan and Ciel. “But Anise. When you dance with death too many times, you become strange. You break.”

“When that happens, you take care of them as much as you love them, the same way we did three hundred years ago. Do you remember Hamel? When we crossed the sea and defeated demonic beasts and a legion of demonfolk, you… could not sleep at night with so many corpses and the stench of blood.”

“That wasn’t just me. All of us were the same back then, except for Vermouth, that bastard.”

“We could calm our quaking hearts because Sir Vermouth remained resolute. We relied on each other and held each other in place to ensure no one broke down. Hamel, don’t think too hard about this.”

There was a slight change in Anise’s smile. She grinned at Eugene with both her lips and eyes before continuing. “You just have to become a figure like Sir Vermouth for the twins.”

“Fuck, don’t say such disgusting things,” retorted Eugene.

“You don’t have to be shy. You secretly admired Sir Vermouth, didn’t you?” teased Anise.

“When have I ever!?” shouted Eugene.

“Don’t deny it now. It’s nothing to be ashamed of, is it? It wasn’t just you but all of us who admired Sir Vermouth,” said Anise.

“No, no…. Not me. I never admired that bastard. To me, Vermouth was—”

“A rival you wanted to overcome one day? Isn’t it more embarrassing to say such things with your own mouth?” interrupted Anise.

“I’m not embarrassed. For me, Vermouth was…. I didn’t like that he was so… much better than me at everything…. So…. I was furious… that I wanted to knock him down a peg or—”

“Stop, stop! I feel like my hands and feet are shriveling up just listening to you. How can you say such cringey things without having anything to drink?” Anise interrupted him once more.

“Shut up…. I’m… not ashamed.” It was a lie. His face and stomach were burning as if he had downed an entire bottle of strong alcohol, and to be honest, he wanted to rip off his snout.

“Are you really not embarrassed? Well, then, how about this?” said Anise with a grin before approaching Eugene. Then she stretched out her hand and caressed Eugene’s chest. “By my will, I followed Sir Vermouth. By my will, I crossed the Devildom with you, Sienna, Molon, and Sir Vermouth. By my will, I took my life at the end.”

“What are you doing? You’re repeating what you said earlier—”

“And by my will, Hamel, I loved you.”

Eugene felt his face reddening. It felt as if his head was going to explode. He panicked and jumped back, and Anise giggled after seeing Eugene’s tomato-red face.

[S-s-sister!]

‘What about it? I’m saying this on my own will. Or, Kristina, would you like to take advantage of this moment and take the courage to speak your heart?’

[I… I’m not….]

‘As if.’

Anise enjoyed teasing Kristina more than anything.

“I also like Sir Eugene by my own will,” said Mer after poking her head out of the Cloak of Darkness and peering up at Eugene.

“But I love Lady Sienna. And Lady Sienna—” continued Mer.

“Stop, little lady. You shouldn’t say such things in her place. It will be more enjoyable to see Hamel’s reaction when Sienna says it herself,” Anise said with a giggle.

“Shut up.” Eugene suddenly raised his hand and slapped his burning cheek.

Mer’s jaws dropped at this sight.

“Have you gone crazy?” she shouted.

“Abel!” Eugene called.

“Woof!”

Eugene ignored the tingling pain in his cheek and ran forward. Abel responded in kind and barked vigorously before charging forward.

“To the Grand Hammer Canyon!”

He could hear Anise giggling behind him.