Saving the Villain

"This is new." Cosette smacked her lips as she cocked her head to the driver's seat. "I was expecting that your driver is waiting for you somewhere."

Asher's lips curled up, eyes fixed on the road. "I didn't want some disturbance. After all, my friend is usually busy, so our time together is precious."

"How did you know I wouldn't have a ride?"

"Because you always commute."

"How did you know that?"

Asher took a deliberate pause as he recalled how he knew her patterns. "I studied you."

"What?"

"I observed you from afar. You can call it stalking."

"What?" Cosette repeated, but this time, in a tone of disbelief. "Did you just say stalking?"

"When Luke ran away from home, I didn't look for him immediately. I know my brother will come home in a week. Luke usually runs away from home and I considered it as his way to snag attention. He usually lasts for a week, but when he didn't come home, I had to come to him," he explained, driving especially slow since her home was just nearby. "The first destination that came into my mind was to look for him in school, and I was correct. I found him."

Asher sported a short smile. "However, I didn't approach him. I don't know what stopped me that time, but I just kept following him. And since you're always with him, I had to see what sort of friendship you, Luke, and Maxen have. It made me jealous, to be honest."

Cosette kept her eyes on his side profile, catching that short smile plastered on Asher's face as the lights from the other cars flashed on them. He wasn't joking, and she was certain of that.

"You three didn't have that much. You walked your way home, sometimes buy something in the convenience store while counting how many coins you have, and things like that. However, it didn't seem the lack of money power ever hindered you guys from having fun," he continued quietly. "And somehow, I couldn't help but wonder how come I didn't have such people around me. What's wrong with me? Am I that boring? Questions like that would cross my mind, and no matter what I do or think to make myself feel better about the things that I have, it doesn't help that much."

Asher drove slower as he cast her a quick look. "That's why I occasionally follow you guys as an excuse to see if my brother was doing well. I'm not saying I wasn't curious about my brother, but at the back of my head, I wished that you guys will fight so he just comes home."

"After all, Luke was like a ray of sunshine to me." He peeled his eyes away from her and set them ahead. "That's how I know that you and Maxen would usually commute home. Even if it's pouring rain, you wouldn't call someone to fetch you. I figured it was already a habit and habits are hard to break."

"I see…" Cosette rocked her head, biting her inner lower lip as if she didn't know what to say.

"It sounds creepy… well, it was creepy. What I did was akin to stalking. Fortunately, it didn't take long to fill my plate, which made me so busy with the company and school."

"Mhm."

Another wave of silence descended on their shoulders, which lasted when the gates of the Blac Mansion came into sight.

"Thank you." Asher broke the silence, making her turn her head in his direction while he kept his eyes ahead. "For not turning me down today and for being my friend. I still like you not as a friend, but as something else, and I will never lie or hide it. But don't worry. I don't plan on pursuing you, knowing you are already with Maxen."

"Being your friend… feels lacking, but at the same time, I am glad we are, Cosette. It's probably another reason I want to study abroad. I like you very much and I know myself. I can be greedy at times — I don't want to hurt you," he continued, stepping on the brakes as they reached the gates of her home. When the vehicle came to a full stop, Asher faced her squarely. "That's why I want to go to a place where I won't see or reach you, Cosette. You said my feelings aren't love, just as I believe them, but I think you are wrong."

"If not, then I won't voluntarily back away. If it's not love, I will compete in a losing fight by means or foul, instead of thinking about what will make you happy." His eyes scanned her beautiful face and smiled subtly. "I like you so much that I am willing to let you go or not pursue you, even when all the cells in my body compel me to chase you."

Asher drew a deep breath, unable to stop himself from saying the things he kept to himself. The feeling he might've had for her, in the beginning, wasn't love, but eventually, Asher truly fell in love with her.

Cosette was his first love, and he didn't want to deny that anymore.

"I love you, Cosette Blac," Asher added, and saying those out loud felt like unloading something heavy from his chest. "That is not a question or something that needs a response. I just want to let you know my heart, and thank you for drawing a clear line even before these feelings grew into something deeper."

"Thank you for not giving me mixed signals. I hope next time we meet, I wouldn't feel this longing anymore while looking at you. Instead, I really hope that the next time we meet, I can say I don't love you anymore. It would be great if you regret not giving me a chance, though," he chuckled at the last sentence. "Anyway, you should be proud that you are Asher's first love and first heartbreak. No one ever thought I would like someone so much because of my personality."

"What are you? A robot?" she clicked her tongue, choosing to be playful instead of dwelling on his confession. Cosette took a breath and then huffed, smiling at him. "I also wish you happiness, Ash. I really do. Let's live a happy life — let's be happy, okay?"

"Mhm." Asher's smile stretched, nodding. "Let's be."

The two of them smiled at each other, only wishing happiness to each other in their hearts. Asher was grateful to her. Perhaps, he thought, that her role in his life wasn't the role he wanted her to have. Someone… whom he was meant to meet, but wasn't destined to be with him.

He couldn't say he was fine with it right now, but hopefully, someday, he could confidently say this was nothing but a lesson learned.