Hellbound Heart

The heavy and sexually charged silence resumed as they held each other's gaze, neither wanting to be the first to look away. His grey eyes looked so determined. So certain. And Elle was completely tempted to tell him 'Yes, kiss me, my mouth is all yours'.

But no matter how much Elle's heart was rejoicing at this moment and for what was about to come, there was still a part of her that was hesitating and thinking twice about going all out. And she knew exactly why she was behaving this way.

Elle felt that he was rushing a little too much right now. Despite the unwavering will that was clearly brimming in his eyes, she thought that maybe even then, it might not be enough to pull them through. His trauma was truly deep rooted, existing within him for so many years that it must be something so beyond complicated. She believed that it was not something that could be overcome so easily no matter how strong his will was. It was not something so simple as him wanting to break through, and they could just go ahead and do it. She had given it some thought and was also of the opinion that the reason he did not get triggered just now, could be because he was in a complete daze.

What if he gets triggered this time since he was now clear headed and was no longer under a strong spell of pleasure?

He began to move his face closer when Elle's hand suddenly flew to his mouth, cupping one hand over the other and covering his lips.

His brows creased a little in surprise at her sudden reaction. He did not understand why she had stopped him.

"Uhm... I... I..." Elle stammered, trying to quickly think up an excuse at why she did that. "How about... we do it tomorrow instead?"

He lifted a brow. Not shocked, but seemingly so curious.

"I am... really happy and glad that you didn't get triggered a while ago and I... I can't wait for more too but... I think we should take it... slowly..." she trailed off and bit down on her lips. "I just don't want you to push yourself too mu :"

"Izabelle." He called out her name. His gaze steady as he grabbed her wrists and took her hands that were still hovering over his mouth. "Listen... I'm not pushing myself too much. And this isn't going fast because it's actually about damn time that I get over this damn thing. I know you're still worried about me being triggered. But believe me baby, I think I can overcome this now all because of you. Just like a while ago... I believe nothing will happen, because it's you."

Her heart swelled from so much happiness that she felt it could actually burst if he continued uttering more of those words of his. Yet still... Elle also felt that Sebastian was perhaps being too positive. That he was trusting in her being there too much just because it had worked once before. She was still a little afraid that something might go wrong despite his positive encouragements.

Elle had her own traumas and demons and she knew full well that overcoming these things were never easy. She knew he could be different because he was a vampire, not a normal human being like her. But the fact that this supposedly powerful man was not even spared from such trauma attacks and actually even had something of the worst only, meant that he was just like her. It would never be easy to break through and overcome it.

"You do wonders to me, Izabelle." He continued, coaxing her with his sinfully sexy voice. "You're the only one who ever did these things to me. I may not trust myself sometimes and most especially when it comes to this. But... I trust you. You have a special kind of magic on me and you've already proven it twice."

Her eyes widened in awe and disbelief but eventually, she shook her head slightly. "You give me too much credit, Sebastian." She told him softly. Magic... huh... As much as she wished for it to be true, she was as far away from magic as it could get.

Magic may not be an impossible thing to her anymore after all the things she had learned about Sebastian and this country. But she also knew that traumas don't get healed by it. No trauma could be healed magically, literal or not. It would never be that easy. If it was, why would Sebastian be living with it for such a long time? He would have gotten rid of it and lived a normal life.

"I may have helped but I believe it all went well because of you as well, Sebastian. You might have found a way to overcome it naturally with me because... because you've been opening up and baring yourself without restraint to me." Elle added. "I think that maybe it's also because..."

"Because I was in the heat of the moment and in an utter daze...?" he finished, perfectly knowing what she had wanted to say. "And that's why you're a bit worried now because I am currently no longer under the complete spell of pleasure and could get triggered any time. Isn't that right?"

When Elle could not respond, but only looked at him open mouthed, the corner of his lips tugged up and he chuckled.

"Your pessimism really does make me speechless sometimes, Iza." He commented, "But then again, I do think it's not an entirely bad way of thinking. You trained yourself to think of the worst outcomes to minimize the impact of it once it really does strike, and also so you could prevent it from happening."

Her gaze lowered. "I don't want to see you like that again." She whispered weakly. "Tonight, had been... perfect... one of the best nights of my life... thanks to you, Sebastian. So, I... I don't want to... I want us to..."

He pulled at her wrists that he had yet to let go of, and his lips landed on her forehead once again.

"Hush now, Iza... It's okay, baby. You don't needa@ to explain anymore.."

"Really? I'm sorry I..."

"F**k, Iza... you have nothing to apologize about, baby girl. You are just being so damned rational right now. You just didn't want to risk this night getting ruined and I'm totally okay with that. In fact, I'm quite glad we can postpone this as well." A wicked and seductive smile flashed across his face as his dimple appeared. And though she had been seeing this dimple more often lately, the effect it has on her had not diminished in the least! "Because the moment I managed to kiss you... I don't think you'll be getting any more chances to keep being in charge tonight."

As Elle blushed hotly from his statement, Sebastian glanced at the clock on the table. And when he saw it was about to strike midnight, he almost cursed out loud. F**k! The birthday present!!!

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A/N: I suddenly felt a little unwell so I took a med and now I am so dizzy I think i've written this chap half awake. >.<

So, sorry but there won't be a bunos chap today guys. I will be giving 2 bunos chaps that our supergifters earned tomorrow instead to make tom's update 3 chapters. Thanks for understanding. <3