"Do you know how long I've lived?"
The Saint Emperor stood with his back turned.
When Damien appeared behind him, he didn't turn to look at him, but he immediately started a conversation.
Damien looked at that back silently.
Even now, with his newfound power, he couldn't see through this man at all.
That back was opaque. It was so fully packed with experience and defense that nobody could see through it, even if they were far stronger.
Damien wasn't here to converse.
He wanted to start fighting as soon as possible and end his fate with this man, but for some reason, he felt obligated to answer.
"I have a rough idea," he said slowly, lowering his hostility.
"As of today, it has been 999,999,999 years. Quite coincidental, isn't it? Despite how long I have been chasing you and you have been chasing me, the day of our fated encounter occurred on this instance."
The Saint Emperor smiled lightly.
"It was a very long time. I cannot properly remember the beginning anymore, however, even then, I was curious about my existence."
He started to tell a story.
"There are many of us who were born with this question in our hearts, however, the majority of our race lacks it. I was the first. At that time, only I had the ability to truly possess a sense of identity."
Follow on NovᴇlEnglish.nᴇt"And as I watched my people, I realized how pathetic they were. I realized the truth behind our existence early, and I was crushed by that realization."
"What was I to do? Submit? Live in silence allowing myself to be controlled? Resist?"
"The answer I found was none of the above."
The Saint Emperor turned around.
His eyes were like that of a snake, but for the most part, he was a handsome man. His appearance was more human than any other Nox. If he didn't have their signature ash-grey skin, it would've been difficult to tell him apart from any normal man.
"Our existence was meaningless. The Nox Race never had its own purpose from the start, and being born into this race as a being with spirituality was the ultimate consequence for me."
"Therefore, I rebelled. I rebelled by forsaking my race entirely and acting only for myself."
Damien frowned.
He didn't know why this story was being told, nor could he understand its significance.
The weight of the Saint Emperor's words was heavy. It weighed down on his mind as the man kept talking, allowing him to understand the darkness that brewed in his heart during those ancient times.
"Everyone was so weak," the Saint Emperor continued.
"We did not know how to use mana properly. We did not know there existed a realm of Gods above. We fought between ourselves as if the entire world belonged to us, when, in reality, we were nothing more than specks of dust in the true expanse of existence."
"And that…"
The Saint Emperor's eyes sharpened.
"...was just too boring."
"Boring?"
Damien replied subconsciously. It wasn't the word he expected to follow such a story.
The Saint Emperor seemed to understand his confusion.
"It is unexpected, right? In normal cases, when an individual becomes disillusioned by reality, they lash out in anger or despair. I felt neither. No, I do not think I am capable of those feelings in the first place. When I looked at the cruel and cold world I was born into, I found it unamusing, and I did not wish for it to stay that way."
"When the first generation that was born alongside me was driven out of the universe they attacked, I watched. When the second followed and achieved victory, I watched. When the third, fourth, fifth, sixth, and the rest came, I watched."
"It was interesting to see how people grew. Whether it be those in the universe or those from the growing Abyss, they always grew in ways I never expected. However, at a certain point, it became stale."
"Regardless of their growth, it always followed the same pattern. Regardless of how the situation intensified, I could see how it would conclude."
"So I created a motivation that allowed me to remain alive."
That was how the Saint Emperor spent the first few hundred thousand years of his life. He was an observer just like the Ancient Sovereign, but he did not have the same perception of space and time that allowed him to endure the time.
It became monotonous, and it almost drove him insane.
No, it truly did drive him insane, but he wasn't capable of feeling those emotions, so that insanity became a cold, calculative instinct that instilled itself in his mind.
"I began to intervene from that point forth."
Every time the Nox returned to the universe for war, every time they were reborn, he dipped his hand into those processes to change them even a little from their predetermined path.
"It was difficult at the beginning. I did not have influence, and though my power grew, as I did not focus on it, it was shallow in nature. Despite my attempts, I was met with failure and lackluster results."
The Saint Emperor shook his head regretfully.
Follow on Novᴇl-Onlinᴇ.cᴏm"When I understood what I needed to truly change fate, I began to train with all my heart. It was then that I found 'that' force."
Damien's eyes narrowed.
He was surely talking about the Void.
"The Dark God's Seed, as it had been termed by our people. It was assumed to be the power of a higher being, and though I only encountered it once, it fascinated me. I was enlightened by its vastness. I began to chase it. And my power began to reflect it."
"I cannot remember when I became unrivaled, but that was the turning point in my power."
His story still seemed pointless, but Damien listened anyway.
He was learning more about this enigmatic existence. If nothing else, the mystery behind this confusing man was starting to be unearthed.
It was oddly fulfilling to see the gaps fill themselves in, but it was also making the Saint Emperor more confusing.
"Almost one billion years of life, can I simplify it into a single conversation? The short answer is no."
"However, you must understand. As I tried to satiate my desire, the universe began revolving around me. As I chased 'that power,' I developed an obsession none could understand."
"I became a revered existence, and my ego became something justified. I became a god amongst mortals, and I treated the universe as my plaything."
"It was amusing. It was enjoyable to watch people dance as I willed them to. It was enjoyable to see how their actions were influenced by my presence."
The Saint Emperor's words were spilling out faster. His emotions were intensifying genuinely for the first time in an untold number of years. This was not a facade like everything else he showed, but the true self that he hid behind the veil.
"Everything belonged to me. Everything except the thing I truly desired."
His voice began to shake.
"I was the main character of the story I wrote through my actions, and as that story became the history of the world, I became the main character of existence."
His eyes locked with Damien's.
"Or, that was what I believed. Until I met you."