Tondemo Skill de Isekai Hourou Meshi

Gumihou: Added some comedic details~♪

It is the day after my visit to Lamberts and I am now diligently preparing food for our trip. As expected, it’s best to work in a proper kitchen whenever I can.

“After all, while there should be plenty of interesting food, good restaurants and stalls at the Royal Capital, nothing beats the seasonings and stuff I could get from [Net Super].”

It was sort of given that we will be going to the Royal Capital.

No matter what I thought, Fer, Sui, Dora-chan and Grandpa Gon were now all eagerly bugging me about going to the Royal Capital~ the Royal Capital~~♪

Gah!

The moment we got home yesterday, Fer’s first word was ‘So, when are we going to the Royal Capital?’

It was followed by Sui and Dora-chan practically singing ‘Royal Capital~♪ The Royal Capital~♪’

“Shall we go tomorrow, Master? I can you there right away if you want it.”

“”Is the Royal Capital a big city? Huh? Huh?””

“”Will there be lots of delicious meat~?””

“Oh my, you guys can’t wait to go to the Royal Capital, huh?”

“Well, we have no choice, for the sake of eating the Leviathan~”

“… I knew it.”

I don’t have a problem visiting a town or big city, but the problem is that a king lives there! The king!! If I were to set foot in that city, I would have no choice but to have an audience with the king…

“Hahh… I guess I have no choice since it’s basic etiquette, but this is so troublesome…” I sighed. “Ugh, will it be alright? You guys, can you please don’t be rude in front of the king? Huh?”

The only lucky thing I could think of here is that only Fer and Grandpa Gon could speak human language. However, Fer is an arrogant legendary monster, while Grandpa Gon is an ancient legendary monster.

One thing they have in common is their arrogant attitude.

Just thinking about how they would act in front of royalty is making my stomach hurt…

“Let’s devote all our thoughts to cooking right now, cooking!”

As if to demonstrate the power of the ‘Solitary Chef’ title, dish after dish piled on the counter, only to be swept into my [Item Box] to make room for more dishes.

I made all of my familiars’ favourites, deep fried dishes, steaks in all sorts of sauces, ginger grilled meats, sliced beef for beef bowls, sliced pork for pork bowls, mabo tofu with plenty of meat, beefy beef stew, and large meatballs. Now and then, for a change, I’d make steamed food too, steamed veggies as well as the obligatory steamed meats…

“Phew, what a spread. Even though I made them myself, I’d say it’s quite impressive~”

Since the food was quickly tucked away in my [Item Box] I don’t exactly know how much I had made, but it must have been a lot.

“I got lost in cooking thanks to the Solitary Chef title, hahaha… haaahh…. Let’s make dinner now.”

For dinner, I pulled out a freshly made tray of oval-shaped meatballs, specifically for tonight’s dinner.

“Tonight, let’s have something like a stewed Hamburg Steak.”

[1]

The meat had already been browned in the oven, so the next thing to do is to make the stewing sauce for it. The nice thing about this recipe is that I don’t have to check if the meat was properly cooked or not since it would be stewed in a sauce anyway.

After removing the meat from the tray to a large, heavy bottom pan, I place the tray on a stove and turned on the fire. When the meat juices and oil started simmering, I added a piece of butter, sliced onions, shimeji mushrooms and some sliced button mushrooms.

Once everything on the tray is tender, add the canned tomatoes along with the water in it to the tray, crumble a few cubes of consommé and stir. Once the mixture started bubbling, adjusted the flavour with ketchup and Worcestershire sauce. Allow the sauce to come to a simmer again, adjusting the flavour with salt, pepper and sugar as needed.

Finally, once the sauce is just right, pour it over the pan of mostly cooked Salisbury Steaks, allow the glorified meatballs to simmer in the sauce for about 10 minutes, and flip once.

To finish, sprinkle a generous amount of mixed cheese on the pan and slide the whole pan back into the oven, setting the ‘grill’ function to lightly toast the cheese on top.

[1]

“It’s done~ now, let’s take this to our hungry beasts~”

I know I complained a lot about them, but nothing beats seeing my food being devoured by grateful beasts, hehehe.

I’m sure my Gluttonous Quartet are hungry now~ ♪

My familiars were hungrier than I expected.

They chomped right into their servings of Hamburg Steaks (served with grilled cheese!) almost before I had the chance to set the dishes down.

“Oi, oi, chew and swallow, will you? Don’t just swallow!”

“Phun, it’s your fault.”

“My fault? How is your uncouth behaviour my fault?”

“Master, delicious smells had been floating out of the kitchen all day…” said Grandpa Gon.

“”Uwoohh!!! The smells were so thick I could almost taste it, but I couldn’t eat it! Ugh, the torture!!””

“”Eat now~ eat now~!””

[2] Hohoho, do you understand the power of my cooking now? This is the power of the Solitary Chef (sob)!

Indeed, when my familiars kept bugging me about Royal Capital, Royal Capital now!! I had forced them to compromise with a simple ‘Phun, I wonder what we should do if there’s nothing good to eat at the Royal Capital?’

Naturally, they replied with ‘Kuuhh, Leviathan! Leviathan meat!’

To which I countered with ‘Hmm… since I am obliged to meet with the king after stepping into that city, I wonder how long it would take. Ahhh, I wonder how long it would take for the butchers of the city to take the Leviathan apart? Oh no, what should I do when there’s nothing good to eat there~~♪’

That little exchange led to the sudden storm of cooking today.

I may have gone overboard a little and served them a late lunch instead of a midday lunch.

Speaking of which, the way they eat those Salisbury Steaks…

Is it really that good?

I cut a small piece off a cheese-covered steak and took a small bite.

“Hm, yes, very delicious. Ah, this makes me crave rice~ I should-”

“Oi, seconds!”

“Seconds here too, please.”

“”Same!””

“”Sui too~~””

“You guys ate too quickly…” I muttered as I got another pan of cheese-covered Salisbury Steaks out from my [Item Box].

What was that? I should ignore them and eat my food?

How could I eat under those starving glittering eyes?

Anyway, I quickly give everyone their seconds. Their thirds, fourths and fifths as well.

It was only after my familiars were sipping or lapping at their after-dinner cola that I finally managed to get a breather.

Unable to resist, I served myself some Salisbury Steaks on rice quickly in between their seconds and ate a tad too much. Woah, I’m feeling a little bloated now.

Let’s have a little after-lunch coffee, black of course.

“Oi, can’t we go to the Royal Capital tomorrow?”

“Can’t, I have to prepare the offerings tomorrow.”

“Gunu– I mean, g-good, we must honour Ninril-sama,”

I’m actually surprised by Fer’s restraint. Wow, he’s a true devotee, huh? Although, I can’t say whether his devotion is wasted on the goddess or not.

In fact, I still have a little time before the next offering date, but considering our plans to visit the Royal Capital, there is a high possibility that I’d forget about it or something, so I better do it while I’m at Carelina.

Yes, let’s take their orders tonight and prepare the goods tomorrow…

“Let’s see, I also have to visit the Adventurer’s Guild to collect the money for the things we sold, pay a visit to Lamberts…” Ugh, I still remember the glint in Marie-san’s eyes. Those were the eyes of a beauty fanatic waiting for their goods.

I should deliver everything quickly and get it out of my schedule soon.

“I thought we could eat Leviathan soon…”

I automatically tuned out everything the moment ‘that word’ was mentioned. Lalala, I’m not listening~♪

I’m not listening because… I’m checking everyone’s status now~♪

Seriously though, I wonder what everyone’s status is like after going through that hellish dungeon filled with horrible S Class monsters…

Let’s start with Fer.

[Name] Fer

[Age] 1014

[Race] Fenrir

[Level] 950

[Health Points] 10181

[Magic Power] 9810

[Attack Power] 9469

[Defense] 10201

[Agility] 10024

[Skill]

Wind Magic Fire Magic Water Magic Earth Magic Ice Magic Lightning Magic Sacred Magic Barrier Magic Claw Slash Body Strengthening Physical Damage Resistance Magic Damage Resistance Reduced Magic Cost Appraisal Battle Strengthen

[Blessing]

Blessing of the Wind Goddess Ninril

Blessing of the War God Vahagn

Hahaha…

What could I do but laugh at these absurd numbers?

He levelled up again, and his already insane stats now looked even more demented.

What should I do if this guy gets even stronger?

Next is Grandpa Gon, but his stats were already monstrously high, so…

[Name] Grandpa Gon

[Age] 3024

[Race] Ancient Dragon

[Level] 1335

[Physical Strength] 10109 (14441)

[Magic Power] 14911 (21302)

[Attack Power] 10376 (14272)

[Defensive Power] 10376 (14823)

[Agility] 5479 (3899)

[Skills] Wind Magic Fire Magic Water Magic Earth Magic Ice Magic Lightning Magic

Divine Magic Barrier Magic Extreme Dragon Breath Breath of the Ancient Dragon

Physical Strengthening Physical Attack Resistance Magic Attack Resistance Magic Consumption Reduction Appraisal

[Ultimate Magic] Soul of the Ancient Dragon

Just what is going on here?

Aren’t dragons too shockingly powerful?

Even so, there are dragons and there are dragons. I still prefer cute ones like Dora-chan.

[Name] Dora-chan

[Age] 116

[Race] Pixie Dragon

[Level] 208

[Health Points] 1319

[Magic Power] 3510

[Attack Power] 3330

[Defense] 1208

[Agility] 4070

[Skill] Fire Magic Water Magic Wind Magic Earth Magic Ice Magic Lightning Magic Recovery Magic Bombardment Enhancement

[Blessing] Blessing of the War God Vahagn

I take it back!

You’re not cute at all!

Why did you have to level up into this monstrous being?

Th-that’s right, didn’t Dora-chan insta-kill one of the S Class monsters in the dungeon…?

Wait, what about my Sui-tan?

[Name] Sui

[Age] 10 months

[Race] Huge Slime

[Level] 63

[Health Point] 2028

[Magic Power] 1812

[Attack Power] 2003

[Defense] 1946

[Agility] 2011

[Skill] Acid Bullet Recovery Potion Generation Multiplication Water Magic Smithing Super Gigantify

[Blessing]

Blessing of the Water Goddess Rusalka

Blessing of the God of Smith Hephaestus

“Pfftt—!”

“”Ew, what-! That’s disgusting!!””

“Oi, what’s wrong with you?”

“Master?”

“”Sui will clean~~””

I had accidentally spat coffee across the dining table and on Dora-chan…

My Sui-tan…

Isn’t… isn’t having such crazy stats at… 10 months old too insane?

“”Aruji~~ okay~~?””

“Sob, Sui~!! Please stay this cute forever and ever and ever~~!!” I howled as I hugged Sui to my chest tightly.

“”What’s with this guy?””

“Just leave it alone…”

“Master…”

[Gumihou: Haha, looks like Fer really understands his master.]

Art from Ying Ying that properly captures Mukouda’s feelings~

[1] Adjusted the cooking style for the Hamburg Steak. Instead of pan frying, oven grilled it instead. Trust Gumi, this is much more efficient. If Mukouda truly has the Solitary Chef title, he’d do it this way.

[2] Make Mukouda’s power trip more obvious.