Tondemo Skill de Isekai Hourou Meshi

Chapter 334: A Little Revenge

Translated by Zzonkedd

Edited by Gumihou and Onionpi

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At the end of the day, my familiars collected:

4 x Orc Generals

12 x Orc Leaders

136 x Orcs

The twins and I had done our best to defeat the Orcs. [1] However, when Fer saw the many cuts, bruises and various injuries on the dead Orcs, his comment was, “Would the meat be ruined?”

What the heck?

Do you really think I’d worry about the condition of the meat while fighting for my life? [5]

Also, the three of us were covered in [8] Orc blood from the extended fighting. [1] I can’t imagine the chaos at the gate when the twins and I arrive all bloodied up…

We’d probably be stopped at the gates or at least be questioned by the guards [8] and I would rather not attract attention like that.

What I would really like to do is to take a proper bath. Which I could since I have clothes, a bathtub and everything I needed in my [Item Box]. However, I don’t have spare clothes for the twins.

It’s not like I don’t want to lend them my clothes but these guys are taller and more muscular than me so my clothes definitely won’t fit them…

Oh, that’s right!

“Sui, can you split into several Slimes and clean the blood off our bodies?”

““Ye~es~””

Sui started to tremble. [2] Then, she grew larger and larger and suddenly split into ten smaller Suis. Nine of the Suis split into groups of three and then jumped onto us, [6] causing the twins to shriek in surprise.

[4] “It’s alright,” I said. “It’s part of Sui’s ability.”

The twins calmed down a little at this.

[6] For a short while, anyone passing by the subjugated Orc Settlement would have seen three people with Slimes squirming all over our bodies sucking away at the blood and dirt from our skin and clothes.

[5] Anyway, thanks to Sui, we were now at least… not as disgusting looking as before.

“Let’s go home,” [7] I said tiredly.

It had been a long day and I really don’t feel like going for a hunt with Fer & Co. [2] The agreement at the end was to go hunting tomorrow.

We travelled back to the city the same way we came, me on Fer and the oddly quiet twins on Sui. [5]

I guess they were exhausted too.

Well, since they’re tired, I dropped the twins off at the mansion before checking in at the Adventurer’s Guild.

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As usual, the Adventurer’s Guild staff quickly went off to fetch the Guild Master the moment she spotted our party.

“You’re back, that was quick!”

“Yeah, somehow…”

“And, er, you looked exhausted…”

“Don’t ask.”

[6] I had been badly traumatized by the Orc Settlement Boot Camp and really don’t want to talk about it.

“Well, did you manage to complete [5] the mission?”

“Yeah, that’s done at least. I have a good number of Orcs with me now, would you like to take it?”

[6] “Sure, let’s go to the warehouse and you can show me what you got.”

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“Ou, Johan! We got some goods.”

“Ooh, it’s you, brother. What do we have?”

“Just Orcs, but lots of them,” [7] I said.

[9] “The Orc Settlement has been successfully subjugated,” said the Guild Master cheerfully.

“Ah, the Eastern Forest mission. Right, show me what you got.”

I obliged and took out the Orcs from my [Item Box].

“Hmm, they looked a bit more damaged than usual…”

“… …” Old Man Johan, surely there’s no need to comment on that?

After that, it was all the usual thing.

Well, there was a slight difference. We only keep the meat from the Orc General and Orc Leader. I sold the rest of the regular Orcs from this mission as well as the ones from the Neihoff subjugation mission to the Guild wholesale.

The Guild Master was more than happy to buy the regular Orcs from me since there was always a steady demand for Orc meat.

“I’ll have everything ready for you the day after tomorrow,” [7] said Willem-san.

“Right, I’ll stop by here then,”

Since I was still tired, we left the Adventurer’s Guild and quickly made our way home. Once we crossed the gates of my house…

“Oi, I’m hungry.”

““Me too!””

““Sui is hungry too~””

It had taken me and the twins a long time to subjugate all those Orcs. Which meant we missed lunch.

I was pretty hungry too but I was more tired than hungry…

It was just too tiring to cook something from scratch.

I should just serve up some prepared food. [6] Yeah, let’s just eat some rice bowl thing of some sort.

[6] Let’s see…

[6] I have Rock Bird yakitori, cooked rice and tons of pre-sliced cabbage…

Assembling the Yakitori Bowl barely take up much thought. Though I made sure to put plenty of toppings for my familiars and loaded up on the sauce.

“Right, here you go.”

““Woohoo! Looks good!””

““Yummy~!””

[6] My smaller familiars happily attacked their Yakitori Bowls in high spirits.

As for Fer…

“Oi!”

“Yes, what is it?”

“What’s all this extra grass on my bowl?”

“…isn’t that the normal amount?”

“No, there is a lot more of it!”

“Hmm, if you don’t like it, don’t eat it.”

“Gununununu,”

Fuhahaha.

That’s right, Fer’s bowl has twice the amount of shredded cabbage compared to Dora-chan and Sui’s portion.

That’s what you get for forcing me to fight under the excuse of ‘training’. This is revenge! Revenge!

Anyway, [10] I ignored the gununununu from Fer and ate my much smaller portion of Yakitori Bowl with plenty of cabbage.

[10] Look, Fer. Ratio wise, the amount of cabbage on our bowls are the same.

[10] So, eat your vegetables.

After a bit more gununununu, Fer eventually began to eat his Yakitori Bowl.

[10]

There’s plenty more where that came from.

Just wait.

All your ‘seconds’ will have twice the amount of cabbage too.

It’s for your own good. So, eat up and be healthy~~

Kukuku…

Gumihou: It’s even cuter that Fer did not just knock the cabbages away but ate them instead, lol

Fer: Guuu

Gumihou: Fer can be so cute sometimes

Fer: Gunununu…

[1] Structural Change: Combine 2 paragraphs

[2] Structural Change: Combine 3 paragraphs

[3] Structural Change: Combine paragraph & dialogue

[4] Structural Change: Change passive sentence to dialogue

[5] Delete Repetitive or Pointless Information

[6] Additional Information for Aesthetic Purpose

[7] Add Dialogue Tag

[8] Creative Licence Taken – Provide reasonable reason for why blood needs to be cleaned off, even if it’s ‘like eww, I just gotta’

[9] Readjusted dialogue so that the text actually makes sense

[10] Adjusted for dramatic purpose