I’ll Quit as The Empress

At long last, Monica and Stella didn’t meet the Emperor. The reasons given by the Palace chief weren’t clear, but they had no choice but to obey the Emperor’s orders.

Stella looked really disappointed, but Monica, the Empress-mother, was relatively calm as though she had expected this to happen.

“Just wait. Your father will make time.”

Duke Metis was betting his political life on the Empress’ seat. Monica also knew how strong her older brother’s obsession was. Specifically, it meant that she had nothing to do.

“His Majesty won’t be able to refuse persistent requests. For the time being, you can stay at the separate palace and wait for an opportunity. “

“Yes…….”

Still, Stella had a naive side. Monica squinted her eyes at that point. But it was just around the corner. By now, Sagan, her brother, was probably trying to find out what the Emperor was hiding.

Monica didn’t want to admit it, but Sagan was a capable Duke. In other words, it was just a matter of time.

Her job was to wait. When the whole thing was over, she would find her freedom again and went back to the Southern Palace, living a fulfilling life.

***

Instead of being bothered by meeting his mother and Stella, who had hopeless hopes, Fabian went to Evelyn’s place, which was connected by a hidden stairway from his bedroom.

It wasn’t planned beforehand, but by chance, it was time for lunch. Seeing Fabian who visited the chamber without notice, Nora hurriedly prepared another meal for one person.

“Am I disturb you?”

Evelyn shook her head after Fabian asked her calmly. A person’s mind didn’t change overnight. But the mood was a bit different now. More than just his apology or promise, Evelyn wanted to pay more attention to what he did.

“If you don’t mind, would you like to have lunch together? … But, this table is too shabby for Your Majesty.”

“There’s no need for special treats.”

Fabian never fussed about serving. He wasn’t a picky eater either. However, he had forgotten how long it had been since he shared the same table with Evelyn.

Previously, when the two were married, they rarely ate alone. They were just seated side by side at long dinner tables along with other nobles according to the Imperial rules.

“Adrian fell asleep after Sir Philip examined him.”

“……, I see.”

Soon, foods were placed on the table in turn. As always, Fabian began to eat his meal in a graceful movement. Then, there was a moment of silence between them.

“That… … I heard it from Sir Philip.” Evelyn opened the conversation first. Fabian looked at her, who seemed to have trouble speaking.

“It’s necessary for the blood treatment …… the ingredients, Your Majesty’s blood, ….he needs more …..”

“Do I look so fragile?”

“No……Not like that.”

Fabian was the noblest person in this Empire. Throughout the Empire’s history, there was never a case of an Emperor giving his blood every day, even though the recipient was his own son.

“The blood drawing process is just like a mosquito bite” Fabian’s analogy was a bit weird. Still, it was his own way to reassure Evelyn.

At that moment, Evelyn felt a strange feeling. It seemed that she sensed the warmth of ordinary people from Fabian for a while. It was an emotion that she had never felt in her previous life who died at thirty.

“Your Majesty…you’ve changed.”

“…..I don’t know what you mean. I’m still the same.”

Evelyn compared him to Fabian from her previous life. But every time she thought about it, she somehow felt lost. She just turned the time back, and she and Fabian were still the same person, not become someone else.

“That sounds weird, doesn’t it? I just honestly told you what I was feeling.”

In her previous life, Fabian was always busy. They never sat together closely at such a narrow table and ate like this. If Evelyn thought about it, there were many things that didn’t happen before.

“Can I hear it more?” Fabian asked her, “What part of me has changed?”

But, Evelyn hesitated to answer his question.

“It’s fine, you can tell me honestly….. No, I want you to do it.”

Fabian looked at Evelyn with his black-eyes. Evelyn took her glass and gulped the water down because her lips felt hot for no reason.

“Then…First of all, I’ve never eaten this close to you.”

That was the rule. It wasn’t Fabian’s fault. Evelyn understood it on her mind, but she was sad.

“I…… One night, I had the most terrifying nightmare of my life.” Evelyn began to tell slowly.

“But I didn’t dare to wake up Your Majesty, who was sleeping beside me, so I had to hold my breath and wait for the day to come.”

Fabian’s eyebrows frowned at once.

“You silly…..”

“Th-that’s because before becoming my husband, Your Majesty is the Emperor of the Empire. I … when I was engaged to you, I learned a few things before entering the Imperial family.”

She wasn’t wrong. It was ridiculous to wake up the Emperor-who was responsible for all public affairs only because of the Empress’s nightmare.

“Then, it’s my fault, who’s-the-Emperor- again?”

Evelyn knew it wasn’t. Same like her, Fabian was a man who couldn’t choose his fate.

“No…… I didn’t mean that. Please forgive me.” Evelyn lowered her eyes, her voice rang softly. After the divorce, Evelyn felt he had changed a lot than when they first met.

“In my eyes, you have changed, too.” Fabian paused for a moment after said that. He was worried about what he should say to convey his feelings. But soon, he spoke again, “After the divorce, on the day of Adrian’s baptism celebration… You saw me as an enemy. I could tell from my intuition.”

Evelyn couldn’t deny it. At that time, she was afraid of him. She hated him because she thought Fabian would take away the happiness she had barely found.

“But now your hostility towards me is gone. I want to know why.”

Their meal was almost over.

“Would you like to talk with me for a moment?” Fabian stood up first and headed for the antique Parlor, and Evelyn followed him quietly.

***

In the Parlor, there were desserts and tea prepared by Nora in advance.

“Evelyn.”

Even after calling Evelyn’s name, Fabian didn’t talk much. Just his eyes looked at her. It was a lovely figure, no different from when he first proposed to her.

“Your Majesty, if you say you still have no idea how I feel……you’ll be disappointed in me.”

Fabian had never learned what affection was. For him, it’s just a trajectory that engraved in human instincts.

“I … have once pictured the future. If Adrian remains alone as he is, he will be the Crown Prince.” Evelyn’s blue eyes were filled with sadness. “According to the law, Adrian will be raised in another noble family. He will be treated as an adult, not a child.”

Fabian couldn’t refute it. Because that was his childhood.

“Even if Adrian grows up and comes to see me, his mother…Will he remember my love for him now?” Evelyn asked in tears.

That question was sadder.

“Only then did I realize. It’s not your Majesty’s fault, and it’s not Adrian’s fault.”

“He’s your child. ……He may be different from me.”

“What about Your Majesty?”

Fabian was tight-lipped for a moment. He immediately felt sympathy when he saw Evelyn. He loved her, and he also wanted to be loved by her. It was the first time he had this kind of feeling. Even an Emperor wished to be loved by someone.

“……At that time, I believed I knew everything. But now I don’t know.”

Fabian was so proud of himself once. When he made Evelyn the noblest woman on this continent. That was also his love for her. But, everyone had changed since the night when the scent of a golden wood tree spread in the darkness.

What Fabian thought of as love was broken. Evelyn turned coldly away from him, saying that her marriage was unhappy.

He suddenly felt desperate when he recalled that time. The happiness he believed had already shattered in a flash.

“Evelyn.” Fabian looked back at Evelyn. There was a pathetic light within it that didn’t fit Fabian’s eyes.

Evelyn and their child were now by Fabian’s side. But there was no law to keep them from going away. That was the biggest change Fabian had ever made in this Empire.

“I….I’ve learned about longing from you.”

Evelyn looked at her husband, whom she once loved. Again, sad eyes didn’t suit him.

“I feel grateful for Adrian’s presence. I also think he’s so precious, but more than that, it seems like he brings you back to me.”

Fabian looked calm, but he said word by word awkwardly. Even Evelyn, who saw him, was nervous as well. Fabian had always been a ruler. A weak heart didn’t suit him at all.

“Your Majesty, stop……Please stop it.”

Seeing him like this, how could Evelyn not care? How could she not love him? Such a man now appeared shabby in front of her. And she never thought something like this could shake her heart.

“You always say it’s already in the past, and you have to let it go. You came back to me just to save our child’s life.”

Evelyn could hardly answer. It would be painful to see Fabian bend his pride more. It’s a lie if her heart didn’t hurt, pretending not to care when his helplessness was so bitter.

“I’ve been wondering for a long time.”

“……yes?”

“To remarry you without feelings… I will give up my hopes for that. I couldn’t do it.”

A cold wind was blowing in Evelyn’s heart.

“But I will win your heart first.”

This time, Evelyn didn’t even come up with an answer, looking at him. Fabian got up gracefully and sat beside her. There was no time for Evelyn to avoid or stop him. The scent of his close body that she felt after a long time reminded her of her past love memory.

“Evelyn.”

Fabian called her name again. It’s a name she hardly heard when she was an Empress.

“The ring……”

What he meant was the wedding ring. The ring now was stuck on Fabian’s finger. When receiving his second proposal, Evelyn also received her own ring that Fabian had worn on his necklace. But, it wasn’t inserted into her finger.

Fabian was now looking at Evelyn’s empty ring-finger, “Anytime, if your heart allows, then you can wear it.”

Evelyn lowered her head.

“That’s……I see it as your answer.” Fabian indeed had changed. And that made Evelyn felt more pain.

“And this.” Fabian took an elegant box out of his hands. Evelyn couldn’t hide her surprised expression, as if she had realized what it was, “Your Majesty, that’s.”

“You know this. It’s a ring with the Empress’s seal on it.”

Now Evelyn wasn’t the Empress. That ring was returned to the Imperial family after the divorce.

“This, too. You can also put it in your finger when you want it.”

“But…”

In a moment, Fabian grabbed Evelyn’s shoulder, making eye contact with her, “I will never marry again unless it’s you.”

Thump

Evelyn’s heart seemed to fall.

“I won’t see my successor from any woman other than you.”

According to Imperial law, everything was wrong. Yet Fabian violated all of the rules of the Imperial family.

“So, this is yours.” Fabian put the box in Evelyn’s hand, holding her hand tightly. His determination was much deeper and greater than Evelyn had imagined in the first place.

“……Even though you’re going to leave me again.”

Evelyn’s heart was filled with painful emotions.

“Why…”

Why…. why she had to face such a lonely death in her previous life……Why.

Only

“Why do you go this far for me?”

Why did he come and look at her with pitiful eyes, give up the Emperor’s authority, and ignore imperial law? Though in the past, he let her die in solitude. But why did this man break Evelyn’s heart again now?

“Because you’re the only wife I have.”

Tuk,

Evelyn dropped transparent tears without even knowing.

The biggest misfortune in the world for them was that they couldn’t convey their feeling in their first life.

Then the next unfortunate thing was that they only found about it in their present life.