The Girl He Craves

Chapter 24

Sophie’s pov

I stared at the casket. The casket that confined Carson’s corpse inside.

My throat burned and every word the priest let out seemed to go on deaf ears.

The only sounds I can focus on was the sound of the pattering rain that fell on the umbrella Ingrid held

over my head so I’d not get wet

I think I deserve to get wet. I deserve to feel the cold of the rain. Maybe then I’d start to feel again.

Since Carson’s death a week and a few days ago, I had become numb. I could not feel anymore

except for the eating guilt

Ingrid wrapped one of her arms around my midsection and held me close as Carson’s parents wept

loudly Their cries were louder than the pattering rain and that did not surprise me.

Mila looks over at me and looks at me in sorrow. She stood beside me and grabbed a hold of my hand.

She squeezes it in reassurance

She knew everything. I told her everything. And she knew how fucking messed up I was now after what

happened

She was the only one who knew why the two boys were fighting that day.

“Wait. No don’t put my baby in the dirt. Wait no! He’s not dead! He can’t be. I saw him last night. He’s

not dead. Don’t put him down yet!” Carson’s mother screamed and started to thrash in her husband’s

hold.

My stomach churns and I feel disgusted to even be in their presence knowing I was the main reason

they lost their son.

I didn’t deserve to be here. I didn’t deserve to recieve everyone’s sympathy while Aiden got nothing but

pitchforks thrown at him. They blamed him. They called him the devil.

Everyone turned their backs on him.

But me, everyone was way too sweet, way too nice to me. I didn’t like it. I hated it. I didn’t deserve their

words, I didn’t deserve their sympathy. I was the main reason Carson was dead.

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If I hadn’t

“No my baby boy! Don’t leave us! Please you can’t leave us! You were supposed to grow old Carson,

give us grandchildren. How can you just leave us so soon?!” His mother screamed, tugging forward but

her husband who was still visibly crying held her back.

Her words had my heart pinching and my eyes began to water again. I have been crying for so many

days, for so many hours that I didn’t know i had any tears left to let out.

But feeling them trail down my cheeks showed me that I still had more than I thought. I wasn’t done

crying and I didn’t think I would ever stop

The casket was now being placed down in the hole they had dug up for where he would rest. I felt sick

to my stomach.

“Noi Please no Don’t put him down’ He’s okay! He’s here with us! Carson baby come out and stop

playing! Carson please stop giving moma anael Carson! Pleasel Carson!’ Hie inom screamed louder,

thrashing harder in her husband’s hold.

“Marge he’s gone Carson’s dad cried, hugging his wife tightly

Her bottom hip wobble as she looks down at the casket that wos now her son’s bed. She cried louder. I

promise I’ll make that devil pay for what he did to you Carson I’ll make that bastard pay

Her words were like a blow to my heart even though they were not directed at me They were directed

at Aiden but I felt it I felt their force

And suddenly I couldn’t breathe. I looked up at Ingrid and said shakily with panic “I need to go ” I didn’t

wait for her to respond, I just turned around and aimlessly made my way through the people around us

“Sorry.” I gasped out when I shouldered someone by accident

“Sophie!” I heard Mila’s voice call out behind me

I needed to get out of here. I didn’t deserve to be here

If Aiden was a devil then I was a demon.

I shook my head, my hair quickly plastering to my face and black dress as the rain shower over me

The heavens felt my sorrow. They felt my guilt. They felt my pain. The rain….. were my tears

Oh Carson. If only you had not spoken to me that day. If only you had not called me pretty girl. You

would’ve still been here

You would still be in your mother’s arms. Your parents would still have their son

This was my fault. All of it.

Not only was one boy dead because of me but another was behind bars and would be going for a

hearing tomorrow. One that would seal Aiden’s fate.

They found a lot of evidence that showed that Aiden was always malicious to Carson. And on the

surveillance camera they saw the two boys engaging into a fight.

They couldn’t hear what they were yelling about but apparently from the angle of the camera, it showed

Aiden had either punched or pushed Carson down the stairs.

That was enough to put him behind bars and hold him until his hearing. What made it even worst was

that Rena recalled Aiden threatening to kill Carson in the diner when they were fighting.

His friends denied it but the owner of the diner also showed the footage from the surveillance camera

where you could hear loud and clear what Aiden had said to Carson that day. Which did include him

saying he’d kill him.

I knew he hadn’t meant it in that kind of way, but with all the evidence and others coming forward to

speak on how much of an asshole he was 10 Carson, Aiden stood no chance.

Had I really just ruined two boys future because of my selfish heart and actions?

I shook my head. Aiden wasn’t the devil. I was

My legs feltjello and weak and I found myself falling on my bottom beside someone’s tomb.

I was a good distance away from the funeral but I knew someone had followed me.

An umbrella hovers over my head to block the rain from seeping to my bones. Mila sat beside me and

one of her arms hugged me.

“Everything is going to be okay Soph. I’ll always be here for you no matter what.” Mila whispered,

kissing my cold cheek

I stared at the trees off into the distance. I knew the mud was creating a mess behind my dress and I

knew that I might catch a cold. But I didn’t care

I could sit here forever. The cold, I wish it could freeze my heart so I’d not feel so much pain.

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“I don’t think so Mila. I’m a monster a huge one for making Aiden take all the fall for what happened.”

My lower lip tremble as I started to cry.

Mila shook her head. “Don’t you say that Sophie. You were not the one who pushed or punched

Carson and had him tumbling down the stairs. This was Aiden’s doing, he made that choice. Not you.

Don’t you dare blame yourself.

I don’t respond to her knowing that she’d always try to make me feel better. But I knew that I was the

biggest cause for what happened.

I sighed shakily and just stared off at the trees in the distance. Tomorrow was his hearing and I was

supposed to take the stand as one of the witnesses.

I had to say the truth. Even if the truth will hurt Aiden or me.

*Day of the hearing

“Would Sophie Bell please take to the stand.”

Hearing my name had my heart dropping in my stomach and a heavy feeling weighing on my chest.

I rose from the chair and walked up to the stand. When I sat down and took the oath, I felt his eyes on

me.

He had been silent as expected to. Bull could tell by his rigid form that he was afraid.

I took a quick peek at him and my breath catches in my lungs. He looked like he hadn’t slept for days.

Carson’s family lawyer walked up to the stand and started asking me questions that made me feel light

headed.

“Miss Bell? It came to our attention that you and Mr. Xavier had a sexual relationship going on between

the two of you?”

Her question had me quickly snapping my gaze to Aiden’s. No one knew about our relationship except

for Aiden’s grandfather, Mila, and Aiden himself. Carson did too, but he was no longer here.

Who told

“Don’t try to deny it. We saw the footage when we went through the surveillance cameras.’ She

continued.

Ashamed to look at anyone in the crowd of people listening intently, I kept my gaze on the wooden

parts of the stand.

I didn’t want to see the look on Marge’s face.

“Yes We were in a sexual relationship