Monarch of Darkness, Arsene

Traveling through the sprawling woods just above the Guiser Planes, perspiration dotted my brow as the rays of sunlight penetrated my natural defenses. It was strange, but despite adapting to the laws, I was still affected by natural laws. Perhaps it wasn't the Laws I adapted to, but rather, my state of being changed.

"Lily?"

"Hm? You about to propose?"

"Huh? What the—Never mind you. Suppose I were to have a system. What would I be at? What level would my darkness be at?"

Lily hummed. "If we gauge off this realm, then your Darkness Proficiency will be at the max." She replied. " You did well in your darkness element. It's not changing any time soon. But you are just weak when it comes to Qi. It was so small when I first saw you. I actually thought someone knocked you upside the head and made you retarded."

"Anyone ever told you you're an ass?"

"As advertised. I'm the sweetness in your life Arsene. The Bad B you can't live without. Remember that."

"My god… Your delusional." ????n????????e????????. ????o????

"I'm like one hundred percent certain you've said the exact thing before."

Damn… is Lily a female version of me? Dear god. The world is not ready for that. No one is ready for that.

Pausing my footsteps, I glanced around at the silent woods. The winds had turned silent, and even the insects had paused.

"Is he the one?" A nasty voice barked from above, drawing my attention skyward, onwards to the crowd of demi-humans. Long ears like an elf, but unlike elves, they held fangs and eyes of a monster, alongside tribal runes of war branded over their arms.

'Aye, sir Zolveck. That's the one." Said a scrawny little thing with a meek appearance, clad in a fur coat, with a leather jerkin hidden beneath.

'Think there here for me?' I asked lily.

"Naw. Probably just lost."

"Ah. Did you guys get lost? Sorry. I'm not from around here." I conveyed in a shout, waving them off as I continued on my way.

"Hold, boy!"

'I think I might make pizza after all this. I'm craving pizza today. Can you eat Lily?'

"BOY!!!!"

'Kinda. But am I about to have one of Arsene's Legendary dinners?" Lily surprisingly praised. " I've been waiting my entire life for this. Although I'd be more flattered if it were from your Master."

"Who?" I didn't have a Master… Mephisto doesn't count. And does he even know how to cook? He should, right? Every respectable man should know how to cook. Restaurants do be fucking up too much.

"Zariel, dummy! He was the one to teach you, right?"

"Oh yeah. I forgot about that. That bastard owes me a meal."

Sidestepping the glint of Sword Intent cutting through the earth, I frowned. " When was the last time we actually had a family dinner? It's been a long time coming, huh? Should I put together one?"

Lowering my center of gravity, I maneuvered downwards, dodging the sword bleeding a nasty aura, and my frown deepened. My gaze hardened and shifted, at the extremely cut man, with razer sharp grey eyes. Gripping a jagged sword that reminded me of shark teeth, the Stranger, in just trousers, bore his fangs.

The first stage Elder God. Battle Prowess is… too early to tell.

"So the boy has some moves." The Stranger praised, narrowing his long grey eyes. "State your name and reason for—"

"Get em' Zolveck! Cut em'"

"Dick him up!"

"Bro, that's gay!"

"Just say no, homo!"

"What?"

"Yeah! Ain't you know? You bang a dude and say no homo, you not gay!" replied the scrawny man.

The crowd of cheerleaders went silent.

"... bro… did you… did you bang a dude?"

Eyes wide, the scrawny man shook his head. " Na…Naw. I said no h-homo."

Ok, so this might be one of the weirdest battles of my life. All of these people are high gods… why do they all sound like juveniles.

"Yuval shut the hell up!" Zolveck snapped, lowering his blade. "And if ya gay, just say it!"

"Come on, mate. It's alright. No judgments"

"Fuck that. Ima judge you. The hell?! You looking at my ass at night?" Another shouted with a teasing smile.

Yup, this is the weirdest battle ever. I don't even feel like fighting anymore.

"Man! I'm not gay! I said, 'NO' homo!"

'Hey, Arsene," Lily suddenly said. "Let's go. This dude looks like he's about to cry."

Nodding, I shadow stepped deep into the region and sighed, unsure of what had just happened. "Should I be mad? I mean, someone did just try to kill me. But that entire conversation drained me."

"Do you think he was gay?" lily asked, and I shrugged.

"Believe it or not, I've had a similar conversation with Vancurro. Can't remember much, but we were talking about sucking dick for a million credits… the usual manly things."

'LOL... That's what men talk about? I'd thought it would be about fucking bitches."

"Well, that too. But it's nice to change it up for a second. Super gay! But I feel like tons of people do that." I said, chuckling, unsure if other people had this issue. "We used to have some weird conversations. For example, a simpleton operating on you vs. a woman doctor."

"Super sexist!"

"Yup. we used to get Mother angry that way. That's why we did it. Although Mother did choose the simpleton… she had me dying. Mother gave zero shits at times. Chillest mother ever! Except when you crossed her. My god, I was shitting myself at times."

"Your remembering?" Lily said.

"And you're looking through my timeline to find more things about me," I said, and Lily went silent.

"I'm trying to find the kids." She replied softly. " Laevatein was shattered. Do you understand how powerful they are? They're not even born yet, but their power can destroy the 33 Heavens. And that power will only continue to grow the older they get. But now the seal is gone. I'm worried."

A bit of a warm smile found its way onto my lips as I knew it was the right thing to do, to allow Lily to be the system admin. She'll look over them.

"There, fine, Lily. Trust me on that." I promised, shifting my attention towards the towering pillar of silvery light. "Let's go retrieve Requiem. I'm sure with that weapon. We might also be able to contact those brats."