Toz had lost all sensation and perception of the world around him as he closed his mind to shield it from the deluge of mana ravaging his body. He even lost any cognition of how much time had passed. Toz's thoughts alternated between spinning like a carousel and trudging forward at a snail's pace. He sometimes felt hopeful about his success, and other times he wondered if he had already died and was hovering between life and death like some sort of disembodied spirit.
However, his mental defense wasn't airtight, especially after his clone began fading and weakening again. The occasional pangs of pain that shot through his body and reached his mind denied any thoughts about being dead.
The moments when the damage to his body leaked through the mental defense and prodded his mind also sometimes let Toz know about the state of his body. And the progress of his breakthrough. But his mind wasn't clear enough to tell the reality from what he felt was happening.
Toz didn't know if he should believe the feeling that his body was on fire or that he was nearing the end of his breakthrough. It did feel like his mana was gradually thickening and compressing due to the mana surging through his body. But was it just an illusion brought by the overwhelming amount of mana flowing through his body and into his mana pool, or was it reality?
Follow on NovᴇlEnglish.nᴇtToz's mind was too hazy to tell clearly. But since mana and magic relied on his mind and mental imagery, he decided to stay positive. It didn't matter what was true or not or if his success was nothing more than a delusion. Toz would make it all irrelevant by turning the false success into reality.
He still locked his mind so that it wouldn't be swept away by the mana rushing through his body. But Toz used the gaps in his defense that let him experience pain to send out signals.
Toz was tired, and his mind was nearing collapse, so he missed a few opportunities to make use of his own lacking defense. And he ended up only feeling the pain of having his body torn apart without being able to influence the breakthrough's progress.
He eventually succeeded, but he quickly realized that each attempt would further erode his defense and put him at risk of losing his life and mind to the flood of mana. But Toz didn't give up since he could also sense that he had to interfere or his body would burn to ash.
Toz didn't know what had happened since he had closed his mind, but during that time, the mana rushing to enter his body had increased beyond what he had initially targeted. And that wasn't the only thing that had happened.
The fire that lingered on the Fortress' remains had been swept up by the swirling mana and started entering his body.
Since it was the remains of Toz's fire magic, it shouldn't have been able to injure him. But after awakening to its true nature and being given access to an entire maelstrom of mana, the fire had gone wild. It was still partially Toz's, but it wasn't enough to leave him uninjured as it ran rampant around and within his body.
Toz had trouble keeping track of everything happening to his body, especially the fire wreaking havoc inside him. But he still noticed how the magical fire didn't leave any permanent damage as ordinary fire would have.
The magical fire and the apparent storm of mana ate away at his body. But his body, fuelled by the same storm of mana flooding it, rushed to recover and heal itself. Toz's natural regeneration was boosted and strengthened by the overflowing mana inside his mana and mana pool.
Toz recklessly spared a thought about how similar it was to how Mindle's regeneration and body structuring process looked. But his mind wasn't clear enough to hold onto or reflect on the thought, and he quickly returned to trying to control his breakthrough.
Follow on Novᴇl-Onlinᴇ.cᴏmAs he gradually loosened his mind, Toz noticed that the mana he had initially wanted to absorb and break through with had roped in the nearby mana and created a vortex of mana that surged toward him.
The vortex of mana was a lot larger and had more mana than he had wanted. And he was in the center of the tornado formed by the vortex. The tornado of mana drilled into him, and it felt like all the mana wanted to enter his body and mana pool.
But just as his initial vortex had taken control over the surrounding mana, the surrounding mana had loosened Toz's control over the mana vortex. His own mana grabbing and leading the cluster of mana he had first gathered had gotten swept away.
Right now, he was undergoing a process similar to the passive training where he didn't have to do anything. The mana was entering and getting dragged into his body on its own.
As he realized that, Toz struggled to restrain himself from cheering.
Since it was happening on its own, Toz didn't have to worry about immersing himself in the mana to guide it to his mana pool. He still had to worry about the mana tearing apart his body and flooding his mind. But he could lower his defenses to the point where he could interfere directly with the breakthrough. He didn't have to rely on his luck and good fortune anymore.
However, it looked like it would be difficult to break away completely from the cascade of mana flooding into his body. Not to mention the fire clinging to and eating away at him.
But Toz was beginning to think that maybe the fire wasn't so bad as long as he could urge his natural recovery to keep up with it. Based on what Toz could tell, the parts of his body that had burned and recovered felt a little better than before.
Unfortunately, he was having trouble convincing his sense of pain of that.