Life didn't get easier, even in another world

265 It was my fualt

Their house had exploded.

They said it was gas leakage. It was winter and the heating systems were working. The windows and doors were also closed all the time, making it more dangerous. They said that the explosion happened because Kairen switched the light. They said doing that had created a spark, and that spark was the thing that caused the explosion. They said such things happened in old houses a lot as the heating systems were either aged or not built safely. They said such incidents would happen throughout the world all the time.

Most of the house was fine despite the explosion and the fire. It was because the explosion was not that big as the gas had leaked on only one of their huge house’s floors, and in only the living room, and the fire was put out quickly. Still, the two people who were at the house at the time of the explosion, Ren and Ron’s parents, were too hurt to be saved. Kairen himself barely survived as he was not inside the house and a huge part of the shock his body would receive after getting flung away was reduced by the snow. They said it was a miracle that he wasn’t hurt badly or his face was not burnt even though the explosion had happened right in front of him.

‘Is it my fault?’

‘It is my fault.’

Kairen couldn’t push that thought out of his mind.

‘If I hadn’t turned on the lights immediately...’

If he had waited a little bit and hadn’t turned on the lights... if he had waited even a few seconds, couldn’t he sense the smell of the gas?

If he had waited outside for his brother and Ron was the one who opened the door, wouldn’t he understand that something was strange?

.....

No. First of all, if he hadn’t started that stupid snowball fight and stopped playing once the snowman was built and the two of them had returned to the house before the gas had leaked too much... Maybe if he never asked Ron to play with him, their parents would be alive now.

Drip

Drip

Without himself knowing, tears were falling down his eyes.

“Hey!”

Ron flinched upon seeing him cry in the middle of chewing his food.

“What’s wrong? Do you have pain? Ren? Do you need me to call the doctor? Hey! Say something!”

He hurried to examine the kid’s face and said anything that came to his mind in a stressed way.

“...ory..”

“Yes?”

“Sorry...”

“...”

“I’m sorry.”

Kairen knew that apologizing wouldn’t solve anything and wouldn’t bring their dead parents back, but that was the only thing he could do.

“Tsk!”

Upon sensing two fingers whipping his tears, Kairen had raised his head to look at his brother’s face, which seemed to have aged several years in only one week.

“I’ve told you so many times before. Nothing was your fault.”

Pat pat

His brother had hugged him and patted his back.

“It was an accident. It was no one’s fault.”

“But...”

“Shhh. Stop thinking about such things and focus on recovering, okay?”

His brother had told him those words countless times, but none of them managed to remove the feeling of guilt from the little kid’s heart.

He hated his brother. He was stupid. He didn’t get mad at Kairen, who caused their parents’ death. Instead, he threw everything aside to take care of him.

He was stupid. Why would you do something like that for a useless little thing that only caused trouble and bad fortune? Didn’t he like to go to university? He had been studying day and night to pass the exam. But after that accident, he stopped everything and went to work to fill his useless brother’s stomach.

How many nights did he wake up only to see his brother crying on the balcony? Kairen did everything he could to make him feel better, but the older boy always said he didn’t need to do anything and that he was fine. Bullshit! He definitely missed their parents.

The balcony was where he and their father would always talk while eating snacks at night. Of course, Kairen would always just listen to them and eat snacks as he was just a little kid and was scared that he would be laughed at if he stated his mind. They would talk about astronomy stuff a lot. Kairen didn’t have any idea what they were talking about until he secretly read his brother’s books. They were too complicated for him, but he somehow managed to understand the theories to some extent. Still, he never joined their conversations. They would also talk about politics a lot. Kairen again tried to read about them in his brother’s books, but they were too boring for the little kid that he decided to just not understand the conversation.

But now, not only their father was not here anymore, even their favorite balcony was half destroyed. Still, that didn’t stop them from spending time there. It was a little bit uncomfortable, but they went there every night to watch the stars.

Of course, that only continued until their relatives gobbled up their belongings, also including that house.

They rented a small place with the small amount of money they had saved and his brother started to work. Kairen didn’t ask his brother anything about why he was doing this and why he didn’t leave him in an orphanage anymore after he got slapped in the face and ignored for a whole week after he first asked those questions.

Instead, he decided to do something himself. He was too young to work, but he promised himself that he would earn a ton of money for his brother when he got old enough.

Their parents had died, but that didn’t mean Kairen’s goals would change. He still wanted to be like his brother. Wasn’t he too cool? He was big, like a mountain, in the little kid’s eyes. He wanted to be like him one day.

After he got old and earned money, he would support his brother instead! He would earn money and send his brother to university so that he could study the thing he always liked.

Kairen said them all to himself all the time, but the guilt he was feeling didn’t get reduced at all. Why was that?

They said it was a miracle that Kairen survived the explosion. But that wasn’t something he was happy about. Kairen hated that miracle. Everything would have been much better if he had just died there.

Now that he thought about it, was that possible that his surviving the explosion was also because of his power? If he had that power from the start... Then was it possible that it somehow protected him?... There was no way for him to find his answer now.

Kairen hated this brother of his. Why was this boy helping and supporting Kairen who had hated him his whole life? Did he want to make Kairen feel even more guilty? Well, he was successful.

Did Kairen feel guilty because he hated his brother, or did he hate his brother because he felt guilty?

He didn’t know.

And even now, this stupid older brother of his has jumped into the battlefield to save him. Kairen was irritated and annoyed beyond words.

Idiot.

Why would you want to save the person who ruined your life?

“Ron...”

Kairen mumbled.

This damn bastard! What did he think when he tried to shield Kairen with his body.

“...Ron...”

He could have died if that thread of fate thing didn’t appear. They were barely saved by the unexpected interference of an unknown thing.

Come to think of it, that thread... Didn’t it look like the light he had seen when he was first moved to this world? The light that surrounded his body the day of the eclipse... It was also the same color as Ariyan’s eyes...

‘I’m remembering all of my memories...’

A thought crossed his hazy mind.

‘Am I dying?’

He had heard that all of your life’s memories flash before your eyes when you die. Then, did that mean he was dying?

He felt as if he was thrown into endless darkness. He couldn’t see anything nor could he hear a noise. It was warm but scary at the same time.

“Ron...”

He mumbled that name again. He didn’t even know if he was saying those words out loud or if he was just thinking about them in his mind. His own voice echoed in his mind.

“Calm down.”

But then, he heard a voice. A voice that seemed to be talking to him. Someone had answered him.

“It’ll be alright... Calm... wn...”

He wanted to see what was going on outside, but he couldn’t open his eyes no matter how much he struggled.

“Rest... It’s...ine... You...be... fi...”

The voice that appeared suddenly faded little by little, getting more and more distant. Kairen was dragged into the darkness once again.