Way of the Knights

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Raven's roar of unbridled rage and despair stirred the very depths of his soul. The moment his roar ended, clarity returned to Raven's eyes. 

His gaze brightened as sweat continuously drenched his entire body. His breathing was hitched and labored and his face was pale. His heart was hurting so much that he's unknowingly clenching his chest. There was a shock and terrified look on his face as he stared at the woman's body in front of him. 

Raven recovered his senses. He couldn't help but look around and finally realize what exactly was going on around him. 

Just like the expelled guy hinted at the rest earlier, this is a nightmare. And a terrible one at that. 

'What a frightening illusion! I was so sure that I was prepared for it, yet I still ended up being dragged by it.' Raven inwardly exclaimed. 

If it was others, then it would've been understandable if they fell for this, but for somebody like Raven to be dragged so easily into this illusion as well? That just speaks volume on how frightening this illusion really was. 

It had to be known that Raven's soul was extremely formidable. In terms of soul power alone, he could almost match the output of a Lord Knight. His will had also been tempered to an absurd degree during his previous life, hell he didn't even feel any fear when he was facing a Heavenly Tribulation before yet he was still dragged into this terrifying illusion. 

'So that's why they didn't even bother changing the exams. It took a soul shaking event for me to wake up from this, and this happened to me, then its very unlikely that others would wake up from this.'

'Test of Courage…Test of Courage…I see. So this is what you guys mean…' Raven sighed once more and continued digging out the rubble. 

"Mom, hang on a bit okay. I'll get you out of there. Don't you dare die on me." Raven urged as he continued lifting the rubble that's covering his mother's body. 

Even though this event was that of the past, it still remain fresh from his memory. Even though this event didn't happen in this lifetime, it still didn't make Raven feel any better about it. Even the words he said just now was the exact same thing he told his mother back then.

Although he already calmed down, his heart was still pounding on his chest. Bit by bit, Eva's body was freed from being buried by the rubble. Raven was pathetically weak in this illusion, perfectly demonstrating the weakness he felt back then. 

Everything was so similar. Even the panting and the loving smile of his mother whilst on the state of near death was perfectly replicated by this illusion. 

That person was right. This is indeed a nightmare. 

With adrenaline's help, Raven managed to dig out Eva's body out of the crash. He knelt down beside her while tears continued falling from his eyes. His heart was aching. He knew that none of this was real but it didn't prevent him from unfeeling the pain. 

"A-avi. Mom doesn't have much time alright. Listen to me…"

"You have plenty of time Mom. I'll save you, rest for now. There shoulder be a healer nearby, I'll take you to her." Raven choked on his tears. 

Eva softly shook her head and said: "You've grown up now my baby. You're now a man. I don't know whether your dad can make it out of this but I already accepted my fate."

"Oh you silly boy. Don't you cry. I told you this didn't I? Life and Death are both sides of the same coin. This is the natural cycle of life. Mom is merely returning to the embrace of the creator. Just like how it should be."

Raven didn't speak, he just continued holding her hand while shedding tears. 

"If there's anything I'm worried about, then it would be you. Mom is no genius but I know that our Kingdom is in a perilous state." Eva coughed violently, her grip over Raven's hand tightened. "No matter what, you must remain safe. Me and your dad taught you many things before. Use those to survive. Stay away from the kingdom for now. Even though it'll be dangerous out there in the wilderness, I am more confident about you surviving there rather than here."

"Never go into the depths of the Red Zone! Unless you have sufficient strength in future. Also, never think about avenging my death. Find a safe place to hide and pay attention to your safety. If you can rescue some people with you then do so but not under the premise of risking your safety! Remember! Your own safety is you priority. Understand?"

Raven forcefully nodded, his tears never stopped falling. He could feel Eva's life force slipping away from her body. She…doesn't have much time left.

"Once you find a safe place and ensured your safety, then maybe you could also find a wife. So long as she's good to you then hold on to her! Don't let her go. If you could start a family and live a life in peace and safety, then I would be able to smile on the other side as well."

Eva's breathing became even more laborious. Her life signals and weakening in an alarming degree, Raven was already clenching his jaws as he watched this, yet he was powerless to change anything. This feeling, was the same exact feeling he had back then. 

"Avi, Mom's feeling a little sleepy. Won't you sing me a lullaby?" Eva smiled, her face was filled with warmth, love and doting towards Raven. A feeling that only mother's can express to their children. 

Raven forcefully nodded his head. With trembling lips, he started singing…

"Hush, now. I see the light in your eyes.

Oh, it's almost blinding me.

I can't believe, I've been touched by an angel with love.

Let the rain come down and wash away, my tears.

Let it feel my soul and drown my fears.

Let it shatter the walls for a new sun. 

A new day, has come…"

As soon as he finished the lullaby, Eva's hand turned cold. Her gaze turned dull but she's still wearing that peaceful and loving smile on her face. 

Raven's whole body was trembling. A sorrowful air was emanating out his body. And as if the sky was mourning with it him, dark clouds formed and started pouring rain, hiding away the bitterness that Raven's tears were. 

He didn't move, he just clutched his mother's body close to his body as if he was trying to see if he could transfer some warmth into her cold and lifeless body. Yet he knows that this won't work…it'll never work. 

Raven wasn't aware how much time passed since then, he could only feel that the rain stopped and his tears eventually stopped from pouring, leaving only a cold, desolate and lonely feeling on his face. 

He gently placed his mother down, he tore a large portion of his clothes to cover her body. He then lifelessly stood up and got to work. 

Using nothing but his bare hands, he started digging the soften soil not too far from his broken home. Raven felt nothing at this point. Even if he could tell that his arms were aching really bad, nothing was more painful to him that losing his own mother. 

The pain he felt when she died on his arms was too much that it made him senseless. He couldn't care less whether someone comes and kills him right now, he might not even realize he was already being stabbed and sliced to pieces. 

He managed to dig deep enough even with just his bare hands alone. He then leapt up, washed his hands on a nearby pool of water due to the rain recently, picked up his mother and descended on the pit he dug just now. 

"I can't even give you a coffin. I'm just the worst child aren't I?" Raven could feel the stabbing pain on his chest as he said this. His voice was choked and broken. He gently placed his mother down, took some of his belongings and buried them with her. Most of these items held great meaning to him and some were even important for protecting himself but he didn't hesitate to leave it behind. 

"Thanks for everything Mom. You're the best." Raven tried putting on a sweet smile but it turned out to be wretched due to how much pain he felt. "I wish we could be mother and son again during our next lifetime."

With a trembling body, he chewed on his lips to prevent his sobs from going out. He then pushed the soil and slowly buried his mother using his own hands. Every action was laborious and painful, it brought him great pain and suffering but he had to do it. 

Once he's done, he took a slab of stone nearby and etched some words using a dagger. It reads: 

"Grave of Evangeline Buford Valorheart. 

XXXX - XXXX

You'll forever be missed."

After erecting the tomb, Raven sat in front of the grave for seven days straight. He didn't eat anything, he didn't sleep, he didn't even stand up from his seat. He mourned for her, alone. 

He could feel his heart slowly being covered in frost and if this goes on, there's no doubting that he'll revert back to his old self. 

By end of the seven day mourning, a sigh escaped from his lips. His eyes brightened and a string of words came out hoarsely from his dry and parched lips. 

"I know none of this is real. My mother is alive and well, so is my Father. I even have twin sisters peacefully growing up back at home. My friends are well and my lover is also alive and well."

"But even though I am aware that none of this is real, I still allowed to continue. I didn't break this illusion because I want to be reminded of my true purpose, the very reason for my struggles and why I seek to reach the peak. I want to etch this event to my memory and remind me to never falter and hesitate. Because if I did, then all of this will turn into reality, and that is something that I don't want to happen."

After a while of silence, a smile emerged from his lips as he spoke once more.

"Now that it served its purpose, then this illusion shall end here."

*Crack!*