Lazy Dungeon Master-Novel

No Stopping Until There’s a Punishment Game!

After the slope were barriers like a Tarzan rope, rock climbing wall, and a wall you had to pass through while maintaining a given pose. But Leona made it through all of them in high spirits.

So now, what stood before Leona and them now was a barrier much unlike those prior.

“Hyaah! I-it moved!? D-do I really have to put my hand in it!? I-is it a living thing!?”

“Ah, the rule is that we can’t tell you the answer. Do your best, Michiru!”

“Not even a hint? Uuu, how frustrating!”

Michiru was nervous as she thrust her hand into the box whose contents she couldn’t see. Only one face of the box was open-faced, which allowed Leona and Suira, who were sitting right in front of that face, to see inside. Well, it’s one of those popular ‘guess the contents’ game.

By the way, I put a mandarin orange in it. Did it move, or did it just tumble about? That second-guess inducing nature is used often.

“Frog, it’s a frog!”

[Whoops, unfortunate, you’re wrong~! The correct answer was ‘mandarin orange’!]

“Eeeh, no way, that can’t be it! It moved!”

[Now for the punishment game. Come in~]

With that, a Golem entered the room. It was wearing black tights for no reason in particular and held a paper fan-shaped slapstick in its hands.

“E-eh, wai—who’s that!? … Ow!”

It made a great slapping sound when it struck the top of Michiru’s head.

The sound itself was rather loud, but it didn’t really do and damage-like damage to her.

Now that Michiru had been struck, the Golem withdrew.

[Alright, here’s your consolation candy. Next challenger, step right up~]

“Yaaay, a candy~! Om nom.”

“Ah, I’ll go up next, Leona-sama.”

I switched the contents in the box when Suira was getting ready. This time, it was a pear.

Suira felt it up. After seeing what Michiru looked like a bit before, she probably thought that being hesitant wouldn’t work out. Doing it this way was much more efficient than being timid, it’s the right way to go about it.

“I got it. It’s a pear.”

[Amazing, that is correct! Boom boom bang bang~! Ah, here’s the pear as your reward.]

“Isn’t that just what you had inside it?”

Like that, Suira got the correct answer without anything too interesting happening. And so it was finally Leona’s turn.

Naturally, I prepared a special item for Leona.

“It’s finally my turn! … I wonder what’s inside?”

Leona quickly put her hand into the hole on the box’s side. Using that timing, I made it so that the other two could see what was inside the box.

“Eh, wait, is that alright?”

“W-wow… eh, we can’t give any hints, alright? But do your best, Leona-samaaa~!”

“Craaap! So this is the pattern where the third person gets something weird!? Gaah, what is it!? A snake? A frog? Or maybe a human head!?”

[Buh-boo! Wroooong~. Time for the punishment game~]

With that, the slapstick-wielding Golem made another appearance.

“Eh, ah, wait, that just now wasn’t my answer! Eh, I can’t?”

[You answered with your hand in the box, so it’s an answer.]

“The heck’s that! At least let me answer properly!”

[… Oh well, I’ll let you have one more try since you’re whining about it. So, your answer~?]

“Kaay! Hmm, what is it…”

The slapstick-wielding Golem stepped back unwillingly. Leona fumbled her hand about in the box once again.

She could feel something with her hand. It felt soft, jiggly… her fingers seemed to press into it if she put any strength into them… was it a big fluid steam bun?

“Eh, wait, it’s food? Ah, that’s not my answer!”

[I wonder? That’d be a hint~. Ah, but if I had to say, I wouldn’t eat it… but I’m a Golem after all!]

“Ahaha, something a Golem wouldn’t eat huh~…. Hmm, this feeling…”

It felt like it would deform itself to her fist and felt comfortable to the touch.

Leona felt it tremble. There’s no mistaking it, it was alive. It was a living thing.

“… Is it a Slime?”

[Is that… your final answer?]

“It is!”

A drum roll suddenly started to play out of nowhere.

[… …]

“… …”

A dozen or so seconds passed with them staring at each other. Once it started to feel like it might go on for too long, a ‘Ta-daaa!’ sound played as the drum roll ceased.

[Unfortunate! The correct answer was ‘Jelly’!]

“So close!! But wait, isn’t a Slime good enough!? It’s super close to a Jelly!”

[Yeah, that’s why I let you try again. You would have gotten it if you said them both over the two tries. But alas, you got it wrong. You missed a 50% chance after losing the 100% chance, what an incredibly fair contest it was~. Alright then, time for the punishment game.]

The slapstick-wielding Golem appeared for a third time. Standing next to Leona, it resolutely held up the slapstick.

“Kyaah~? Be gentle with m—kyaah… hauu?”

The slapstick came down onto Leona’s head with a loud bang.

… The Golem and Leona stopped moving for a moment afterwards as though to enjoy the moment, but both started to move immediately upon hearing the Host’s, Euma’s, voice.

[Alright, good job, Golem-san. Leona, here’s your participation prize candy. Please move on to the next room through the door to your right.]

“Kaaay~. Let’s go, Suira, Michiru!”

“” Okay, Leona-sama! “”

Leona and the rest headed into the next room in high spirits.

Moreover, the next room’s barrier was piping hot oden. [1]

*

After Leona and the others left, the slapstick-wielding Golem put its hands to its head and slowly detached it.

… To be exact, it was Setsuna taking off a paper mache Golem helmet.

“Puah! Aah, that Golem head was so hot…”

“Good work, Setsuna-san~”

In order to set up an opportunity for Setsuna to get a hit in on Leona, I prepared the rule that the Golem would [Strike the person’s head with a slapstick if they lost as a punishment game].

Leona kept avoiding the punishment game, but she finally had one. Unexpectedly, Suira hadn’t been missing either. Even for Michiru, that was her first punishment game.

Also unexpectedly, they were also able to make it through the physical-type variety games since Leona was supporting them… Well, after trying so many random things to make her have a punishment game, I finally prepared a barrier that had a practically fixed loss.

With all that going on, we had Setsuna get inside a Golem. Then, we had her hit Leona on the head with the slapstick… In other words, the goal of Setsuna wanting to hit Leona was fulfilled.

Assuming her wish got fulfilled one-sidedly with this, I won’t need to do something like cooling Leona down after attacking her. Otherwise, I’d have to show her Setsuna getting out from inside the Golem at some point.

… I hope she’ll accept this as her wish being fulfilled.

“So, you did hit Leona with the slapstick~… was that enough~?”

“Mmm, I thought that it wouldn’t be any good if I couldn’t hit Grandma straight up, but it feels like the curse has broken. I want to check, so could you help me take this off?”

“Yep yep, comes right off~”

Nerune slipped out from inside the Golem with Nerune’s help. Setsuna’s clothes and skin were covered with sweat due to her wearing the paper mache suit the whole time while waiting for Leona to get a punishment game.

“Hmm… mm. Hmmm…”

Setsuna felt around her body like she was groping herself.

It didn’t look like anything had changed from the looks of it, but—

“… Un, the curse has lifted.”

Setsuna’s face grew delicate. The curse was lifted, but was there something else?”

“That’s the most important thing~”

“Thank you, Nerune-san.”

“Yeah~, now for our reward~? You can pay with your body if you want~”

“Un, I’ll promise to do anything that I can do. I could even work for a month if you want.”

“Hmmm~. I’ll just try asking my superiors~… By the way, what did Leona do to you~?”

“… U-umm… M-my body has a secret…”

Setsuna squirmed as though she was embarrassed.

I wanted to ask as well. Just what did Leona do?

“I was cursed to believe that I was originally just an ordinary girl…! She even made Nayuta think that!”

… Eh, you were like that from the start?

Heeeh…

Footnotes:

Oden is a Japanese one pot winter dish consisting of several ingredients such as boiled eggs, daikon, konjac, and processed fishcakes stewed in a light, soy-flavored dashi broth. Ingredients vary according to region and between each household.