How To Live As A Writer In A Fantasy World-Novel

We reached the point of no return. The only thing left is revealing my identity as Xenon to Adelia. Since the manuscript happened to be in my room, proving it won’t take long. However, I have no intention of disclosing it right now. Even if we’ve became lovers, it will take time for her to fully fall for me.

I need to wait until I’m sure she will choose me without any hesitation after I reveal myself as Xenon. To ensure not to make a mistake in a moment’s choice, not to hold any lingering regrets.

Look at the present moment. Despite having just experienced the deep, intense first kiss moments ago, she was still wearing an uneasy expression. With an anxious look in her eyes, she repeatedly asked confirming questions, as if she couldn’t believe the current situation.

I responded to those questions with a warm smile, and in a low, soothing voice, I opened my mouth.

“If it’s too unbelievable, should I give you another kiss?”

“··· ···”

As soon as I said that, Adelia’s face turned as red as a volcano about to erupt. Her lips trembled like the waves, expressing her feelings in an instant.

As I mentioned before, Adelia was starving for “affection.” Being born as an illegitimate child, her family environment was truly the worst, and during the exhibition, she even faced worse.

So, instead of playing pranks, giving Adelia warmth would be better. But there’s one thing that I can’t quite understand.

“Noona, why did it have to be me? There are plenty of guys with affection like mine in the world.”

As I said, there are many men in the world similar to me. Rather than a man like me with many women around, it would have been better for Adelia to meet a man who only had eyes for her.

In response to my question, Adelia blinked her sky-blue eyes and then replied with a complex smile.

“Even if I revealed that I’m illegitimate, would they really treat me like you?”

“···”

“Illegitimate children are treated much worse than you think. Among nobles, they are seen as a threat to power or as cause for discord in the family, tainted with impure blood. The commoners treat illegitimate children as nobles. It’s a status that’s neither here nor there.”

The treatment of illegitimate children is indeed as Adelia described: not good at all. It could lead to significant discord within families and is entrenched with strong negative biases.

Above all, there’s a clear distinction between “legitimate children” and “illegitimate children.” Legitimate children, even if they are born from concubines, receive a certain level of noble treatment. However, illegitimate children are born from relationships outside the family. There inevitably exists a difference.

The reason Adelia calls herself an illegitimate child rather than a legitimate child is also because of this. If she isn’t acknowledged as part of the family, she would have to label herself as an illegitimate child rather than a legitimate one.

I reached out and gently stroked Adelia’s head as she stood there, lost in melancholy. Startled, she slowly lifted her head to look at me with surprised eyes.

“…Isaac?”

“You don’t have to blame yourself anymore. I’ll make sure you forget everything about being an illegitimate child. Understand?”

“··· ···”

At my words, Adelia bit her lip hard, tears welling up in her eyes. Soon enough, she leaned into me. Just looking at her like this, she seemed so tearful and fragile. They say people who laugh a lot often carry many inner wounds, and it seems to be true.

I intend to cherish Adelia until all those wounds are healed, and I’m willing to provide her with ample affection as a remedy. The scars might remain from deep wounds, but the healing itself will be sufficient.

“…Isaac.”

“Yeah, noona?”

“Do we really have to meet them now? Will they even allow it?”

She’s probably referring to Marie and Cecily. Normally, she would have referred to them as ‘those kids,’ but now she spoke of them in a more elevated manner as ‘them.’

Even though the line has been crossed, permission is still necessary. Adelia herself being of illegitimate birth makes it even more daunting.

Even if Nicole were to go and insist, the moment she faces rejection, Adelia’s heart will quickly burn down like a piece of paper on fire. And once again, new wounds will be etched.

I’ll do whatever it takes to stop it. I’m already prepared to take several hits.

“Don’t worry. I’ll try my best.”

“…Can I trust you on that?”

“Yes.”

I said affectionately while gently stroking Adelia’s head to reassure her worries.

“I might get scolded a lot, but it’ll be okay.”

Knock knock.

As soon as I said that, the sound of someone knocking on my door reached my ears. Adelia and I immediately turned our gaze towards the door upon hearing the sound.

‘They’ve come.’

Checking the clock, it’s already half-past five. The last class ended around 4:30, so we must have talked for an hour before they came.

I said it would be fine, but I couldn’t help feeling nervous. I stroked Adelia’s head once again and got up from my seat, walking towards the door.

“Yes. I’ll go.”

It’s a tense moment. I took a deep breath, lowered the doorknob, and slowly opened the door.

It’s probably just a misconception that it feels like the gates of hell are opening. While briefly having an unnecessary thought, I checked the person who knocked.

As soon as I opened the door, I saw very familiar faces. Not only Nicole in a uniform, but also Marie and Cecily standing beside her.

I could roughly guess why they had come. My intuition about the Gates of Hell was precisely accurate. Awkwardly, I chuckled, but feeling the chilly yet intense aura, I couldn’t help but shudder.

The source of that energy was none other than Nicole, who had knocked. She gazed at me with cold, sunken golden eyes.

“Uh… you’re here? Did you… talk?”

Something was dangerous. My instincts were screaming. As I awkwardly chuckled, Nicole slightly lifted the corner of her mouth. However, the problem was that while her mouth was smiling, her eyes were not.

It was an unmistakably eerie atmosphere and vibe. I slowly stepped back in unease, but…

“Hey, you…”

Nicole widened her eyes and then exclaimed.

“You rascal!!!”

She kicked me right in the chest, a very precise and clear kick that could have appeared alongside a roaring battle cry in a movie from a past life.

It’s a flaw that I took that kick. Naturally, due to the strong pain I felt in my abdomen, I couldn’t help but roll backward.

Fortunately, she hadn’t kicked me hard enough to cause serious harm, but it was painful nonetheless. As I’ve not encountered many opponents since reincarnation, the pain feels even sharper.

“W-What?!”

“N-Nicole!”

Suddenly, everyone was startled by Nicole’s abrupt kick and hurriedly approached. Whether I said anything or not, Nicole relentlessly stomped on me while I lay collapsed on the ground.

She seemed to be controlling her strength to some extent, but I could sense intense anger with each kick.

“I thought there was only Adele, but there’s one more?! And she’s even a beastwoman, not to mention the chieftain’s daughter?! You’re quite the princess collector, huh?”

“No-noona, just a moment…! Let me explain…”

“What explanation! That elf you claimed to be friendly with… seems like you’ve gotten quite close! No, maybe you’re already beyond ‘close’! If you collect one person from each race, you’ll go down in history as the greatest playboy, just like that! Xenon is said to be a pure lover who only cares about one person, but he’s being a damned playboy!”

18 years passed after my reincarnation.

“Ouch! Ahh!”

“Noona, hold on! Isaac might die like this!”

“Let go of this, Marie! We have to do something about that guy’s lower body first! Otherwise, it’ll only get worse, and as a sister, I can’t let that happen!”

“No, don’t! Leave the face and below as they are and just do it in other places…”

For the first time in my life, I was beaten like a dog by my elder sister.

*****

When people feel pain, their minds suddenly sharpen. It’s not just a superstition that getting hit brings you to your senses for no reason. Because you don’t want to get hit, you do whatever it takes to snap out of it and escape.

I’m the same way. When I was kicked by Nicole, my mind cleared up instantly. Although it’s shocking to have been hit by my close sister for the first time in my life, I could understand, given my situation.

But pain is pain. She aimed for places where it wouldn’t cause much harm even if I got hurt, but it’s inevitable that it stings. I just have to endure it.

“Ouch…”

“All right, it’s settled after all that fuss.”

When I was rubbing the part that was stinging, Nicole warned me in a sharp voice. She even crossed her arms, indicating that she was still not over it.

Though her terrifying warning made me shudder, since I was at fault, I couldn’t say anything. I just stayed put, trying to read the atmosphere.

“Thank you.I don’t care about anything else, don’t touch Isaac’s face, below, or his hands. Other than that, he can be like a corpse.”

Cecily, sitting on the right, gently stroked my head while teasingly saying. Marie, sitting on the left, nodded in complete agreement.

I wanted to retort, but I bit my tongue, fearing it might just invite more insults. I’m a sinner and a troublemaker, after all.

Yet, even with Cecily’s joke, the tension didn’t ease. If anything, it only increased.

I’m already feeling nervous but I wonder how Adelia feels. She’s sitting opposite me, knees pulled up, visibly tense.

It may kinda be a marriage interview, amusingly enough, but for her, it’s probably the most nerve-wracking moment in the world.

“All right then… Adelia, was it?”

“Yes, yes!”

Adelia replied stiffly to Marie’s question, visibly tense to anyone observing.

“Please speak comfortably. We’ve all heard from Nicole. You can relax.”

“I, I feel uncomfortable doing that… I’m sorry.”

“If you’re uncomfortable, there’s nothing to be done.”

Marie shrugged as if she didn’t particularly care. Then, she pinched my cheek and pulled it out teasingly.

“Ow, that hurts. Marie.”

“Good that it hurts. Anyway, Adelia, Isaac’s…”

Marie paused mid-sentence and glanced at me briefly. It was a question asking if I had disclosed my identity.

Recognizing that, I gently shook my head. It wasn’t yet time to tell Adelia.

She nodded once, smoothly continuing her sentence.

“It’s because of your kindness, right? Even as an orphan, you see yourself without any judgment.”

“Y-yeah.”

Slap!

As soon as Adelia finished her sentence, Marie lightly slapped my cheek. It stung a bit but oddly refreshed my mind.

In the meantime, Marie glanced at the nervous Adelia and, folding her arms, spoke her mind.

“Actually, I don’t really like it.”

“Excuse me?”

“Marie?”

I was immediately faced with an obstacle. I wanted to plead and somehow convince her due to certain circumstances, but I couldn’t in the current atmosphere.

This had to be resolved between Marie and Adelia. However, right from the start, there was a discord.

As everyone waited for Marie to speak, she glanced at me once, then released her arms and subtly took my hand.

Facing Adelia’s surprised expression, Marie began to explain the reason.

“If Adelia-unnie had come because of Isaac’s status, he might have rejected it from Isaac’s side. But Adelia-unnie fell for Isaac himself. She held love for Isaac in her heart. She said she only had a pure love for him. Nicole-unnie noticed that and pushed Isaac.”

“…Yes.”

“That’s why Nicole-unnie apologized fervently earlier, even hitting her head on the ground. She pushed Isaac without knowing Leona was there too.”

As she spoke, Nicole glared fiercely at me. I couldn’t gather the courage to meet her eyes and focused my gaze on Adelia as much as possible.

Adelia’s expression stiffened more and more as Marie continued speaking. However, seeing her sky-blue eyes occasionally wavering, I could tell she was conflicted.

The two fists placed on top of her thighs repeated opening and closing, and her trembling breath resonated in my ears.

“I’m similar to you, Unnie. My status isn’t an issue, and I love Isaac as a person, just like you.”

“Then, what about the princess…”

Adelia paused, shifting her gaze to Cecily, who was in close contact with me. Crimson and blue sky-like irises exchanged glances.

Sensing those looks, Cecily linked arms with me, displaying affection. Outwardly, it seemed like I had two beautiful maidens on either side. But the reality was close to hell. But this was undoubtedly my fault.

“I’m the same. Despite the reduction in discrimination against demons thanks to Xenon’s Biography, it hasn’t been completely eliminated. And when I’m with Isaac, I feel like a human, not a demon. Warm affection, a kind attitude, and even stam- energy comparable to a demon… there’s nothing lacking.”

Trying to say ‘stamina’ but switching to ‘energy’ in a hurry, Cecily diverted the conversation. It’s very much like her. I chuckled bitterly.

She also had a liking for me from the beginning. However, it was only a liking, and it fell short of being considered rational in terms of emotions.

First of all, the difference in lifespan was clear. It was because she realized that I was Xenon and didn’t even consider things like lifespan, and if it wasn’t for that, it’s unknown whether she would have connected with me.

Therefore, it can be said that Marie was the one who truly loved me from the beginning. The current Adelia is the same.

“See? That’s why it’s unsettling. Both of us fell in love with the person Isaac, but you came barging in here. Of course, Isaac probably won’t have such profound concerns, but our position could become precarious.”

“T-That will never happen!”

Perhaps she was afraid that Marie might refuse. Adelia cried urgently but abruptly stopped herself with both hands covering her mouth.

No matter how urgent it was, shouting face-to-face was clearly against etiquette. That’s how urgent it was.

However, Marie smiled casually and opened her mouth.

“Don’t worry. I might be a little grumpy, but we’re not rejecting you, Unnie. Cecily has similar thoughts.”

“Yes? Then…”

“Instead, there’s a condition.”

At the mention of a condition, Adelia restrained her expression instead of being moved. She must know well that the condition is the most important.

Then, Marie, holding hands with me, showed a kind smile and spoke.

“Unnie should also understand that ‘officially’ marrying is only between me and Isaac for now. Cecily is still ‘unofficial.’”

“Marie?”

“Why? It’s true, isn’t it?”

“Do you have to emphasize it like that?”

It seemed Cecily was upset when the word “unofficial” was mentioned. However, Marie pushed forward diligently, not wishing to be deprived of the title of the first because Cecily didn’t have any desire for it in the first place.

“Anyway, I don’t know which of us will inherit the title, but it’ll probably be Isaac who receives it from his father. Or the royal family might confer a separate title. If that happens, you might become Isaac’s concubine.”

“Yes, that’s true.”

“But if you become a concubine, there’s a high chance of constant surveillance from the Ters Kingdom. Even if you renounce them, there might be things that could be traced back to you.”

“Ah…”

Adelia sighed at the somewhat realistic conversation. It clearly meant that she was officially designated as a ‘concubine.’

The situation would become complicated if the Ters Kingdom recognizes Adelia not as a bastard but as a ‘child’ in the future. Even if the Minerva Empire and Adelia refuse vehemently, ‘lineage’ holds immense power in society nowadays.

In other words, it’s difficult to accept Adelia even as a concubine. That damn lineage continued to torment her like a shackle.

Around the time when even Adelia and perhaps I felt a sense of pity, Mari unexpectedly made a proposal.

“So, I have a suggestion, Unnie. How about becoming a personal maid instead of a guard knight?”

“A personal… maid?”

“Yes, a maid. Not just an ordinary servant but a personal maid who attends to Isaac and me.”

A maid and a servant mean the same thing. However, a personal maid performs a role similar to a ‘secretary.’

Managing the employer’s schedule is basic, but they also act as an assistant, following around and fulfilling the duties of an attendant.

When you first glance at it, it may seem similar to being a maid, but a personal maid is undoubtedly a noble. One common misconception is that a personal maid is not a servant but has rather a companion-like relationship with a high-ranking noble. Adelia is certainly qualified to become a concubine, but it might be easier for her to become a personal maid rather than risking trouble with the Ters Kingdom.

Just as everyone was astonished by the proposal that could be considered cunning, Marie continued confidently.

“In the mansion, you’ll play the role of a maid, and when you go outside, you’ll return to being a knight escort. That way, you can be close to Isaac and even receive love as you wish. How about it? Does it sound good?”

“Well, becoming a maid is not exactly… I don’t dislike it, but I’m not sure if I can do well…”

“It doesn’t matter if you do well or not. Knowing Isaac’s personality, he’ll do his own tasks. It’s the same for me. What do you think?”

“… … “

Adelia hesitated at Marie’s proposal, then shifted her gaze to me. It was an indication of whether it was acceptable to be appointed as a personal maid. In response, I nodded my head.

Honestly, I’m curious. The always carefree Adelia, welcoming me in a neat maid outfit. In various ways, my thoughts were drawn to that side.

When I nodded my head, Adelia opened her mouth with a surprised expression.

“…Alright. I’ll accept it.”

“Great. I’ll give you the necessary books, so study hard in your spare time. Oh, and…”

Marie paused for a moment, then reached out her empty hand and grabbed Adelia’s hand. Adelia, momentarily startled by Marie holding her hand, looked at her with a puzzled expression.

Then, with warm eyes fixed on Adelia, Marie spoke with a voice filled with sincerity.

“Welcome to the family, Adelia-unnie.”

“…”

“Now, don’t suffer anymore and live happily. You’re worth that, unnie.”

Perhaps that one sentence struck a chord in Adelia’s heart. She initially had a vacant expression, then her lips trembled slightly before she slowly nodded her head.

Finally, placing her other hand over Marie’s hand that held hers, Adelia spoke with a choked voice,

“Thank you… really… thank you…”

“Yes, unnie.”

“I will definitely… sniff… I will definitely protect you.”

She really was someone who sheds tears easily. It’s probably because she has been through a lot of pain.

As a warm atmosphere began to settle, Marie slowly stood up. Adelia looked at her with a tear-stained expression, puzzled. I felt the same way.

In the midst of this, Marie ignored those looks and called out to Cecily.

“Cecily?”

“I’m coming.”

Did they synchronize their movements in advance? At the call from Marie, Cecily rose from her seat without any hesitation.

By the way, Marie held my hand, and since Cecily had linked arms with me, my two arms involuntarily lifted upwards.

As the bewildering situation continued, Marie looked down at me and spoke coldly.

“What are you doing? Aren’t you getting up?”

“Uh, what?”

“If you have any sense, wouldn’t you get up?”

What on earth is happening? I really have no idea.

However, I could understand the situation from Cecily’s subsequent words.

“Isaac.”

“Ye-yeah?”

The chill in Cecily’s voice was far colder than the freezing wind.

“Did you really think we would just move on like this?”

It was much colder than the northern winter.